It’s nearly two years since my mum passed away.
I didn’t know my step dad that well but have supported him for the last couple of years. We became a great support for each other. But I was overstretched as I care for my husband and have a house renovation ongoing plus my own health problems. It wasn’t sustainable. Thankfully since stepping back from the hours and stress worrying about my step dad I am feeling better.
Unfortunately my feelings towards my step dad are changing. I suppose the grief has settled somewhat and I have found the traits in his personality have become irritating. To be honest I have come to not like him so much as a person. He tells me and other white lies all the time. I find it disrespectful. He gets jealous of other men talking to me and questions me about it. (I am happily married, been with my husband 15 years). If we go out socialising with friends and I’m out of sight he asks me where I have been and is annoyed. He is often unhappy and jealous about my progress in things I am achieving. Not always but often. He has other family but they have not been around. He expects people to contact him and he does very little work in that respect. I’m finding it hard to stay friends with him. I have enough on my plate. He just sleeps all day and is up all night. I feel like I’m not respected. I feel he has inappropriate feelings towards me (I am in my 40’s he is 82). And I’m not sure what to do. He has to find new accommodation which there is no one else to help him with. We share the same friends. I guess I’m just here for a moan but I wondered if anyone else had been through something similar where over time after supporting their none blood parent things changed over time once the grief had settled down? I will help him still … I hope things settle again between us
I know he is lonely. I know he is looking for another partner. But he does nothing to help himself. He lives independently, can food shop, get taxis