Shocking news

Last week, I found out through a news article online that my beloved friend had ended his life. I’ve never felt that kind of shock and devastation before.
He’d been really struggling with his mental health for a few years. All I can hope is that he’s now found some semblance of peace.
Even though we used to date and have remained good friends, I’ve never met his family or friends and I’m sure they don’t really know about me. I’ve tried messaging his sister online but no response.
I’m struggling to accept that I won’t get to attend any sort of funeral to say goodbye. I’m also not ready to say goodbye.
At the start of this year, I attended the funeral of a friend who passed from cancer.
My friends were 30 and 29. I can’t help but feel so angry that they didn’t get to live out the lives they wanted and hoped for.
I’m not coping very well with the grief I feel.

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I’m so sorry for your loss and how you found out.
You are entitled to feel grief and all sorts of other emotions.
I’m wondering if the sister hasn’t replied not because you are being ignored but maybe because she is not in a place to engage with anyone.
I still haven’t looked at the sympathy cards months on and I miss and don’t reply to messages as I can’t face it.
I hope you manage to make contact and find out when the funeral is. X

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