Sister committed suicide

Losing a sibling
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My younger sister and I were always close last year her behaviour became erratic and she blocked me on social media Later she sent me some realy horrible texts so I told her I was done and was walking away Fast forward to November I got a phonecall she had taken her own life it turned out she had been using drugs and developed an addiction she left four adult children behind I had absolutely no idea she was on drugs but there have been so many lies and cover ups one answer only leads to more questions I can’t find peace and feel so angry and have stopped speaking to my niece and nephew because they knew and the mess they made of their own lives put enormous strain on her already fragile mental state how can I live with this and move on

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Hello @Robbie63,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your sister. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support. In the meantime, you may wish to look at these Sue Ryder resources which might be helpful.

You might also want to look at: https://www.sueryder.org/grief-support//experiencing-loss/sibling

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,

Alex

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I’m so sorry for all you’re going through.
Suicide is especially challenging with So many unanswered questions and no sense of closure, I can’t even begin to imagine .
Addiction is brutal and so damaging for everyone , not just the person with the addiction. It seeps into so much and causes so much pain.
I hope you find some support in here

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Thankyou for your kind words Addiction is brutal I can understand the reasons she found solace in drugs but I’m angry that she didn’t seek help she was a nurse and will be missed by many she would help anyone and took in numerous animals The hardest part is that her whole life spiralled out of control in the space of ten months and culminated in her ending her life The family is torn apart one sibling blaming another I can believe the devastation and heartache she has caused I just feel so drained by all the grief I’m trying to shield my family all I want from the group is just an outlet for the pent up feelings

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I can appreciate needing an outlet. There are also specialist groups for those bereaved from suicide.
Uksob is one and Papyrus is another.
Sob I believe is a call line so you can actually talk and it is run by those bereaved by suicide.
If you google them perhaps they can also be of support to you.
Wishing you the very best.
Sorry you’re awake at the witching hour too. My brain seems to get busy at the worst times !

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Thankyou for your kind words and I’m so sorry for your loss Like you I’m trying to navigate through this anger Her tox screen came back a few days ago I had convinced myself it was an accidental overdose but this does not appear to be the case There was a lot of lies and coverups and the result is a family torn apart because of it I know I’m angry and lashing out but at the moment it’s all I’m feeling Seeing the shock on peoples faces when you say suicide is a conversation stopper and I don’t want peoples pity so when people ask I lie I know it’s part of grieving but suicide puts the anger to a whole new level

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My sister died from alcohol addiction aged 30 and I feel loss but I feel angry cus she was selfish so this had led me to not grieve properly

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Plus after she died my mom put her on a pedastool completely forgot she died from alcohol then my mom died a year later from obviously not dealing with my sister don’t let it get the better of U it does me but I smile pretend I’m happy xx

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Hi Thankyou for your kind words I’m trying to move forward with my life I still feel angry sometimes at the hurt she’s caused my nephew in particular has suffered and has been referred to a psychiatrist Now I just feel sad that I will never see her again Grief has no time limit and a year isn’t long for you either and I hope you find some peace I’m trying not to hang on to negative feelings what’s the point the only person whose hurting is yourself