Six months today

08 July our lives changed forever. The knock came to the door at 10.30am and I was told my beautiful son had died in an accident. Most of me died in that moment to. Life since has been a turmoil of emotions. And sadly I have spoken to so many who experience this pain to. You have to revalue everything don’t you, work out how you even feel about so much now. And the exhaustion most days is unbelievable. It’s knowing that no matter what I do, think, change etc I can’t fix the one thing that I want to. How do you live with knowing you’ll never see your child again. Life is cruel. And everyone you get on your feet again it deals you another blow. Apologies for rambling. And love to all x

Oh Orchard I am so sorry you are feeling so awful. I understand how you feel. It is absolute agony isn’t it. No matter what we do or don’t do nothing can bring our precious children back. I think it was you that said days keep dawning. They do and somehow we have to get through them because we are left here, and we have got this far, we have got through Christmas, and also New Year.
There really is no consolation but please know you are not alone. Sending you hugs. xxx

Thank you Matella, your kind words mean a lot to me. You’re right we have no choice but to keep going. It’s just such a difficult road. How are you coping? I’ve no doubt you’ll be having similar feelings…x

Today has been awful. I think now the numbness has worn off it’s hard to accept that this is it.
This has happened to so many parents which makes you wonder how many people we walk by in the street are feeling the same. One day I hope that we will be able to feel that our children are truly with us at peace in our hearts. We were of course fortunate to have them, to be mums, to experience the love a child brings and we would never have wanted that any other way.
Take care. X