I lost my partner 7 weeks ago, he’s my soul mate, my absolute best friend. I feel so broken.
I can’t see past this and I am so anxious that this is my life.
How do I ever get past this without him. ?
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So sorry for your loss! I lost my husband 9 weeks ago on Wednesday, we were together 20 years.
I’m absolutely lost and so broken… have never felt pain like this 
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I lost my husband 6 weeks ago after sudden illness, I feel devastated and overwhelmed, really don’t know how to cope, sorry to hear your stories, take care
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So sorry for your loss x
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Lost my husband 6 weeks ago. Everyone keeps telling me we were joined at the hip. He actually resucitated me 6 years ago when I had a bleed on the brain. Not sure how I will ever get through this. Arent we all in a mess?
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I’m so sorry for your loss!! 
We’re all in such an awful place and it’s so unfair and cruel! Xx
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Julibobs we are all in this living nightmare together, we are guilty of loving our partners and this is what we have to try and live with. I don’t know how we do it but we must. people say take things day by day and I think this is the only way , try not to think too much, (impossible). I am a weeping mess most of the time. This forum is a life saver, people here understand, be kind to yourself, lots of love 
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I lost my husband nearly 11 months ago suddenly and unexpectedly. We were married 25 years. I’m quite a lot further down the road then you. I would say it does get easier and the rawness of the beginning is gone. I still cry often and miss my husband terribly. We have been robbed and lost our future plans and dreams together. I keep myself busy and started back at work part time. Been away a couple of times. The worst is wanting to tell him about my adventure. I talk to my husband all the time and light a candle most evenings. This grief journey is like a roller coaster and can suddenly come from no where. I always tell friends how I feel and luckily they have been a great support as well as some lovely people I have met on here. Keep talking and reaching out. We all understand. Big hugs xx
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I lost him suddenly while on holiday abroad. So frightening , so shocked and I still feel like this is someone else’s life . I feel like I am in a bad dream. I miss him so much. We went every were together did everything together. We had dreams and plans , now what do I do ?
I ask myself that every day.
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@Paupet I am so sorry that you lost your husband in such a tragic way. You will be in shock and will be for a long time. I still have bad days and triggers. I was in shock for a long time as found my husband when I got home and did CPR on him then found out he had undiagnosed stage 4 kidney cancer. Felt so guilty that I didn’t notice.
Just live one hour at a time and don’t look into the future as the future hasn’t come yet. We don’t have control of the future like we didn’t have control of the past. Life is indeed unfair and so cruel. Sending you big hugs xx
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I can sympathise with this awful situation, my husband was taken ill while on holiday, we managed to get him home and into a UK hospital where he died 7 days later, unbearable, no time to get treatment as it was too late. Dreadful shock for you I don’t know how to deal with this either, take care x
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Gosh, so many of us, losing people we loved so quickly. Life is cruel
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I feel like I’m in a nightmare.
Losing him on holiday must have been , well awful , doesn’t begin to describe it.
What a horrible mess we are all in.
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My lovely wife Christine died nearly two years ago.
The first year or so I was in shock. I know the time passed but it was all dreamlike. Now I have awoken into a living nightmare. It is ghastly.
But we loved our partners, our soulmates. So how can it be other than it is that we are so devastated, almost destroyed when they are no longer with us here and now?
I try not to think of the future. It is way too painful. I will quickly spiral into weeping and such intense feelings of loss that I have to completely disengage from everything for a while to try to recover. But of course I think of the future …
As @Hazel.1966 says, just live one hour at a time and try not to indulge thoughts of the future. At the really bad times I just focus on getting through the next couple of minutes. Care for yourself as best you can. Comfort yourself as best as you can. This is enough. But it may be incredibly difficult at times.
Whatever: you are not alone in your feelings, you are not losing your mind. You are perfectly normal. Talking can help, and this forum is a very helpful and supportive place.
Best wishes to you @Paupet.
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20 weeks since I lost the best, most beautiful, kind, loving, caring and fun person, the time I had with her was the only time I have truly felt happy in my life. She was everything I ever could have wanted and more, a gift.
To keep stress and anxiety at bay I find living day by day suits me, I have some idea of what opportunities like ahead for my now solo life. But I don’t dwell on it long, else I buckle and cry until the hurt makes me stop.
Take it slowly, do only what you feel able to do, when you want to do it. Although, there are formalities that have to be done, they are hard, and a distraction. I found once all the arrangements were complete and I didn’t have that to focus on, it actually was even worse.
I’m taking it slowly, keeping in touch with closest friends.
There is nothing else I expect of myself, it is all I can do, but I accept that and make peace with it.
Love to all
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I can relate to all the feelings and emotions expressed by all of you. I lost my beautiful husband of 40 years (we’ve been together for 46 years) 6 weeks ago and my whole world collapsed. I have cried every single day since losing hi wondering how to cope with the pain and go on. Like everyone else we did everything together and our future plans have been snatched from us.
I have found this forum so supportive because you understand what we are going through. Sleep has also not been easy for me and I go through the motions of daily living waiting for this awful pain, loneliness and yearning to ease
Take care everyone and sending love to all of you. xx
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It’s coming up to 17 weeks (next Saturday) and I’m finding it is getting easier, having said that the tears are never far away. I’m gradually getting used to the loneliness, I don’t like it but have to accept that there’s nothing I can do about it.
The thing is that it’s different for everyone, I went out for lunch the other day with a friend who lost her husband 3 years ago and, while he was much older than my partner and had been in declining health for the last two years of his life she is not really coping as well as I appear to be.
My life has changed but because of my partner’s mental health which often restricted what he was able to do I guess I was used to having to go places either on my own or with friends so for me I guess I am used to being pretty independent outside the home. My hard part is being at home on my own. I am not looking forward to the weekend (starting Friday and ending Tuesday) as for 4 days I have nothing in my diary and will be at home alone for most of it.
I’m rambling again. I guess what I’m trying to say is we none of us know how we will feel from day to day and a lot of that will depend on what our relationships were like and what our own motivation is going forward.
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I agree the being at home alone is the worst, I can’t seem to find were I fit .
I don’t feel like anything is real and I can’t make a decision about anything.
Even when I look in the mirror I don’t feel like I am looking at me.
It feels like my heart is being crushed by a vice.
I am just hoping that one day this will ease and the pain decreases. X
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Hi Paupet, you echo my exact feelings, I’m trying to fill my days, but it’s not the same as when my husband was here, it’s just doing things to be busy, not living like we used to do. Hope your weekend brings some relief and happiness, will be thinking of you xx
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My heart was broken and has been in pieces since over two years ago. And I look ahead, and see nothing… only abyss. Feel so disconnected with this planet … feel everything is meaningless, because future is robbed…the final chapter of our lives have been ripped away, forever. Now I only look to the day of my departure… why pretend that this is not the case… for I do not want to ever give up on him, even though he had to leave physically. Doctors have given up on him, but I never have… so I pray everyday that one day God grants our eternity together…
Now I am so …so broken… my heart has been in pain…
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