So hard to accept.

Hi everyone. I have previously posted but just needed to come back. I am 16 days on from losing my mum. It was very sudden and unexpected. It has been such a shock and just totally devastated.
I have the funeral looming next Thursday and just absolutely dreading this day.
I have been visiting my mum daily this week at the chapel of rest and I will miss being able to do this as well. I’m just still trying to take it all in.
Just so so sad to have lost her and for her to have gone when she was enjoying her life so much and was making some plans for the next couple of years. I will learn to cope with the grief but life will never be the same.
So sorry for everyone who is going through this x


@RachelM I’m so sorry for your loss…sending you a big hug xx
Its been 6 months since I lost both parents, 3 weeks apart. I still can’t accept it. I tried to use distractions to cope with my grief but after a while, it all caught up and it all came crashing down. Please try & share your feelings whenever you can. I do find this site a wonderful place where everyone understands and listens without judgements.
Sending you strength to get through next Thursday. Please take care xx


@Ang2 thank you for hearing me and replying. Just needed that. This forum is such a help.
I am so sorry for your loss - that must have been so hard for you to lose both parents in such a short time. Grief is just so powerful and so unpredictable. Sending hugs and love to you and everyone going though this. Thank you and take care, Rachel x


Hi @RachelM it’s awful losing your mum. I lost mine just over 2 months ago so have recently been through what you’re going through with the funeral and chapel of rest. I found it really hard to visit Mum in the chapel, as it felt like her spirit was no longer there, but after a couple of times seeing her I did catch a glimpse of who she was, but it was really hard. My mum was so full of life and love , and like yours, she had so many plans still and was living her life and enjoying herself, had recently joined a bunch of clubs. It’s completely not fair it was cut short and she didn’t get to keep having fun and doing the things she wanted to do. I remember just getting through the funeral day by saying to myself I have to honour my Mum’s memory on that day and be strong for her, and celebrate her life and how amazing she was/is. I can fall to pieces and cry endlessly after. Which I did (and still do.) Hope you have people to support you on the day x


Hi @Woo4. Thank you for your message. The sadness for them at what they will miss is so hard. Especially when you know they still had hopes and plans for the future.
I will definitely keep your experience of coping with the funeral in my mind next week - this is much appreciated. Thank you again and take care xx

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@Woo4 - meant to add, I am so lucky to have an amazing family for support on the day :heart: xx


Hi @RachelM I think the funeral day is a very ‘unreal’ kind of occasion, one that you dread but want to be right in equal measure. I remember feeling a sense of relief after it was over because all the organisational details fill your time after the death. Be prepared for a feeling of ‘now what?’ because the funeral really does mark a closure. Then comes the rest of time when you have to work out how to adapt and manage the grief. I wish you every strength in facing this emotional time. Take care xx


Thank you @Rosiepink. I think you are so right. We have not stopped since that terrible day. Planning every minute detail, just to try make it everything that my mum would want. I suppose the next step in this grieving process will be working it all out once everyone else returns to their normal lives - including my return to work. It takes a very special person to touch someone’s life in this way. I wish you well and thank you again for your support xx

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