So loney

Lost both parents 9 weeks apart. My heart is ripped out and I’m so bewillered. Mum was after a short illness. Dad was suddenly just yesterday.

I have no idea what to do. It hurts so much I feel like I’m dying from the inside out.


Hello @RobBeat08 ,

I’m so sorry to hear about your parents and so very close together. It sounds as though things are very overwhelming at the moment and you are feeling in shock and hurting.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share these links with you to help you with your grief.

You might already be familiar with our other Online Bereavement Support services, but if not, you can find out more about our Online Counselling service, our Grief Coach text support service, and our Grief Guide self-help tools by visiting the link.

You may also find this Sue Ryder Article of use, take a read when you feel ready. Losing a parent - coping with the death of a parent | Sue Ryder

Take care - keep reaching out,


Rob, that is so terrible. My heart goes out to you. Please continue to reach out and ask for help.

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truly sorry. vapid words for such a catastrophic thing to go through.

I have a family member one week apart. I think one spouse needs the other so much. most older people had long marriages. mine were three years apart. married 60 years. I am so sorry. you will survive but it will take some years.

grief counseling helped me a lot. I suggest it wholeheartedly.


Hi Rob,
Keep posting lovely x This site is amazing and people will reach out and help you. It’s the worst pain imaginable so take small steps each day.
We are here for you x
Deborah x

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Thank you Deborah. I’m so broken-hearted. It feels like I’m out of body and can’t breath. I’m not sure I’m strong enough to survive this.

Thank you for taking tome to reach out @berit. I’m not sure how I will survive. 2 so close together fees too much to bear.

I’ll try counselling and journals.

I’m broken.

Thank you @Burgled. I will.

Hi Rob,
I felt like that when my mum passed. It’s normal. The breathing frightened me though as I was gulping for breath at times so I know a little of what you are going through. I took baby steps each day and I absolutely mean baby steps. Set yourself a few targets for each day as you have to survive each hour and day. Don’t look ahead Just get through the morning then the afternoon then night time . One of my targets when it just happened was simply making myself a cup of tea bec I just couldn’t function. Getting out of bed was another bec I couldn’t even do that. I didn’t wash eat or look after myself for months so the first thing you have to do is try to look after yourself. Just eat something to keep you going and get through any important meetings then relax and do nothing except think of yourself.
Two do close is beyond and comprehensive and I don’t have any words to help bec it’s so cruel.
Just keep posting ok bec there are super lovely people on here who understand and will help and support you with so much love and friendship
This site became my lifeline and I honestly couldn’t have got through my mum’s passing without it.
Am here anytime for you
Deborah x

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I lost my dad less than 2 weeks ago…I feel the same, like I can’t breathe it hurts so much😥

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I’m 3 weeks since dad. The breathing has improved but I still feel anxious and have the shakes. Excess of cortisol aparently.

I hope it eases for you soon.

Sorry for your loss. Grief sucks!

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Keep going Rob and Che
It’s still such early days for you. Just get through a morning then an afternoon and don’t plan further than that. For now it’s just small steps and one day is enough to try to get
It is the worst pain imagineable so you just have to do whatever you can to get through each day.
Keep posting and thinking of you
Deborah x

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