So much loss

Coping with bereavement
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I never thought I’d be writing this but here we go.
I feel I’m stuck in constant grief over the past 22 months I’ve lost 5 family members two aunts then my mom then another two aunts the grief for my mum is overwhelming and I suppose my question would be how do you grieve for multiple people at once as I feel lost and confused :confused:

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Hello @Misskt,

I can see that you’re new to the community, so I wanted to say that I am so sorry for the losses of your mum and aunts that brings you here.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help right now.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,
Alex

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Hello I am so sorry to hear this, I can’t comprehend so many loses in such a short period of time! I feel bad enough just losing my mum which is coming up to a year ago!

I watch a lot of videos on tiktok and there’s a channel where a grief counsellor talks about different kinds of grief and mentioned grief that is called cumulative grief which is what you are going through unfortunately! They recommended grieving each person individually, I am not sure how this is achieved but thought I’d mention it.

I’m sorry I’m not much help but wanted to reach out to you anyway x

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Hi Both,

So sorry for your losses. We can never " Prepare " however or whenever it happens.

I too am going through similar after multiple bereavements. I too lost 5 family members and 2 friends in 2.5 years, including the last of my aunts and uncles, and my dad. It’s left me on my own now and I’ve been really feeling it. I do have some family left but they’re not local. I’m divorced, no siblings, live on my own and don’t see or hear from my daughter after my marriage broke down.

Yes its known as " Cumulative Grief " We need time to process each bereavement, and recognise it fully. It can take years to adjust and start to " Heal " after 1 loss, let alone several…
It’s 3 years on Sat since I lost my dad and it’s been a tough week. It brings it all back…

I’m here too if anybody wants to chat…

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@Misskt so sorry for your loss. My mum died 16 days ago. We are all here trying to get help and get better. I can’t even imagine what you are going through, the loss of my mum broke me. But I wanted to reach out and let you know you are not alone in this. Sending you warmest hugs x

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Well I think I’ve just started with cumulative grief as my partner lost his Grandad 2 months before I lost my Mum, also a collegue of mine passed this year and now today I found out that my partners Gran has passed. I’ve now gone completely numb which is new to me but I think I may have reached my limit now. His grandparents were like my own grandparents they were really good to me, even signed their cards to me from grandma and grandad.

I am now in fear of losing my own Gran which is the only family I have left who I have a special bond with, I shouldn’t even be thinking this way nor to I want to think this way but it’s so hard.

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@Misskt

Have you thought about counselling?

Has anybody here here been?

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@Phoenix36 hi there, I started councelling when my mum was still in hospital as I already knew prognosis was very poor. I had 3 sessions and it helped. Unfortunately its private but I can’t really put price on it. I don’t think I could have managed without ot

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@Ola13

Hi,

I’m glad it helped. I had private counselling after my divorce several years ago. I think I was trying to tackle so many different things and not just that, that I think I felt like it only partly helped.

I’ve not had any bereavement counselling ( yet ) I did ask about it a couple of years ago but didn’t feel in the right place. I was also struggling with my mental health and wasn’t sure which way to go.

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