It’s three weeks since I cycled round the corner just 100m from home to find my husband of 45 years lying on the pavement breathing his final breaths. He had been a couple of minutes ahead of me and somehow had come off his bike landing on his head causing catastrophic brain injuries despite wearing a helmet. Since then I have never felt pain like it. I lost my mum at 90 and could console myself with the fact she had lived a long and happy life. My husband was 67. We had been retired 9 years and travelled the world. We were soul mates. He was my world. We have two amazing children who live locally and are doing a great job propping me up even though they are grieving for their dad. It’s his funeral on Monday and I really don’t know how I’m going to cope. I know the road ahead is going to be tough. I just can’t accept he was taken from us so suddenly. Just a few days before his death we had a family party in the garden and I remember thinking how happy my life was, and now I am struggling to get through each day
Dear Ellie-Lou I am so sorry you are going through this heartbreaking situation. My life was broken apart when my wife received and cancer diagnosis and given five months to live. We left the hospital crying in eachothers arms. I was very fortunate that my wife managed to live nearly two years. She was only fifty eight when they found she had bile duct cancer and she was so fit and strong. We were hoping to retire early in a couple of years and start to enjoy life a little. We closed our business the same day of her diagnosis as I wanted to be with her every moment. She died in my arms on Christmas day, her last breath was a call to her mother and I hope they are now happy together in heaven. This site has been a godsend to me and I hope you find some solace here where everyone understands the pain of a bereavement. Wishing you all the strength you need and sending hugs
All the best Tom
Hi Ellie Lou I lost my wife December 21 st and 7 months on the pain is unbearable,we were married 63 years and the feeling of loneliness is undiscibable .we have four children and two of them are always there for me.the funeral is a terribly hard day to go through ,but I’m sure your children will give you support although they are devastated at loosing there Dad.it will be the the worst day of your life on Monday but the love in your family and the memories of all the good times you all spent together will help you..i cry everyday and night but the people on this site really help as we all know the pain.wishing you peace and comfort in th future, thinking of you all the best Dave
Dear Ellie Lou,
am so truly sorry for your loss. You must be in horrible pain right now. Back in January this year I was hugging my husband of 35 years back telling God, “this is all I need to be happy, being with my husband in good health”. At the end of February my healthy 60 year old husband had a sudden cardiac arrest and died. The first 4-6 weeks were horrible, time seemed to have stopped, at first I couldn’t eat nor sleep. Slowly I began to have moments of calm, moments of normality. So know that although the sorrow and sadness won’t go away, the anguish and the intensity of the pain do get a bit better over time. I hope you have people who can help you. If you are struggling with, for example, horrible anxiety in the mornings, go to your GP and try to get pills to help with that (I did). Try to take it one day at a time. In this forum we are all in this incredibly painful journey and understand what you are going through. Sending you a big hug!
Hi and so sorry for your loss. It being so recent as well. It’s shocking how our lives can change in an instant, one minute you’re happy, then your whole world starts to crumble the next. I lost my partner suddenly 10 months ago.
It’s good that you have support to get you through the funeral. It’s normal to feel numb and confused in the early months. Try to eat and keep hydrated. Don’t look too much to the future, it really is one day at a time for the moment. Take care.