Solo Cruising after bereavement

My darling wife and I used to enjoy a cruise once or twice a year. The pain of losing her seems to gradually get worse, not easier, as time passes. With every day a virtual agony for me I wondered how i would cope with a cruise on my own next year - would it be a two or three week distraction or would Gill’s absence at every occasion on board make the cruise just a different kind of hell? I wondered if perhaps somebody here might have tried? I see that SAGA’s two new ships have over a hundred single cabins each.

@PeterL Very early days to worry yourself about this. Do try not to think too far ahead at the moment. Things fly around our heads trying to look for a way out of our grief. I think we have to learn how to live with it somehow. Saying that my friend who was widowed 7 years ago has been on several Saga holidays. She had a nice time. I don’t think I would have the courage myself. :butterfly::broken_heart:

I think it’s good that you are thinking ahead about plans that involve the future Peter …I suspect that if you choose to go on the adventure you talk about it will bring mixed emotions as every experience we have after our loss leaves us with a pool of emotions at least that has been my experience …yes you will miss your beloved wife …yes you will long for her to have been there with you .but I’m sure she would want you to keep living life …I bet you also hold a lot of happy memories of your previous cruises / holidays to …my feeling is …we can avoid our triggers or we can face them and then be proud that we survived them …just as we do each day we are without our loved ones …wishing you happy sailing if you go Peter …

1 Like

As ever Johnswife you give me very sound advice. Gill died on a Sunday morning and I find Sundays incredibly difficult to cope with, I was just fantasising - I could never holiday without her. I honestly don’t see any point in going on without her, it is just torture.


@PeterL My John also died on a Sunday morning. 4am. I hate Sundays as well! I always wake up at the time he died. It’s as if I have an inbuilt alarm clock. :butterfly: :broken_heart:

Dear @PeterL I will be thinking about you tomorrow. Sunday such a sad day for us now. :frowning: :butterfly::broken_heart:

To plan is good Peter, you can always change your mind, but like you, I wanted to carry on and revisit special places, doing familiar things. My first solo holiday was 6 months after my husband passed away. This progressed to exploring new places. I don’t feel alone, I know my husband is right by my side. I also drive to my daughters from the north of England to her home in London several times during the year.
You have the experience of cruising, that makes it the perfect choice for you. Glad you have started the thread, you will help others who may also be thinking the same as you and I’m sure others like myself will share their experience.
I would add that I’ve only experienced genuine kindness from those I’ve met on holiday.

Dear Sheila,
I am very sorry that your introduction to cruising was such a dreadful one. My own fondness for cruising began about a hundred years ago (seems like it anyway!) Gill and I went on a Geest Banana boat from the Bristol Channel to the West Indies and back, then we were hooked and went on to enjoy more than 40 cruises all around the World.
Now, without her, it would be unthinkable except for one thing. Saga (yes that Saga!) have built two brand new ships
“Spirit of Discovery” and “Spirit of Adventure” and they each have 100 single cabins. They organise special “solo” events and even arrange dedicated coaches for single folk on shore trips. I must make it clear that I have absolutely no connection with Saga other than having sailed with them on a few occasions with Gill. We found them to be cosily British ships with caring crews.
Anyone who has followed these ramblings so far must be wondering what I am leading up to. Simply this - How about a Sue Ryder block Booking on a Saga cruise? We would be with people who totally understood our condition,
we could hug each other when sad and, if we wore name tags on the first night or two, we would recognise each other from our website.
Crazy idea?
Love to you all, peter


@PeterL it is a lovely idea and perhaps something for the future when this horrible virus is beaten. I am also on a forum called WayUp and there are different sections on there. One part is like this one but there are others where people talk about the things they have done and achieved. There is also a section where people are making plans to go on holiday together and some have already done so in the past. Its under the heading Travel Chat. It might be of interest to you. Love to you Peter :butterfly: :broken_heart:

Peter, what a fabulous idea, that’s one huge plan. Your personal experience is amazing and when you are ready it would be great to hear more of your adventures. Thank you :slightly_smiling_face: