Step son in law

Hope i have put it in right group my step daughter lost her husband on Friday passed he was only 41 she is struggling with who should carry coffin she has picked the first 5 his dad and brother my grandchildren have picked there choices as they don’t want to do it they have chosen his 2 best friends the fifth is my step son now the hard part she does not want to upset her real dad or me as we all get along i have told her its up to the 3 of them to decide who they want and i would not be upset if its not me should i tell her i dont want to do it to make it easier (I’ve been the step dad for 20 years and real dad has been here all time as well) any advice is appreciated

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Hello @Bri1, thank you for reaching out - I’m so sorry to hear of your step-daughter’s loss. I’m just giving your thread a “bump” for you. I think this is such a personal decision with no right or wrong answer, but hopefully someone will have some advice for you.

Take care

Yes your right there is no right or wrong answer as i have bad shoulders i was thinking of saying i can’t do it to make things easier for her but she knows i would not say no to her under these circumstances my grandson really wants me to do it but i have told him it has to be discussed by the three of them i was thinking if she does ask me i was going to say to her to ask her younger sisters boyfriend to do it as he has been in the family for over 10 years thanks