Still can't believe she's gone

I lost my Mum in December and I’m really struggling to cope with dealing with it. I find it worse when I’m gardening and suddenly think of her and the fact that I can’t contact her. Also, just not being able to pick up the phone and tell her my problems. To be honest I struggle to accept the fact that she is no longer in our life. I am 62, an only child and believe that I should be able to deal with it but just can’t seem to.

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Hello,

I’m sorry, this is a terrible time for you, especially as you are an only child. I lost my mum in December and then my partner in March.

I think about both of them all of the time, I often come in and want to phone them and talk about what’s happened, to tell them what I’ve been doing , then I realise I can’t.
I can’t accept either of them have gone and spend most of my days getting upset and crying about them. I talk to them and tell them things that have happened

There is no reason you should be able to deal with it, losing your mum is so final and makes you feel so alone.

Did your mum like gardening ? mine loved it and her garden was very peaceful.

You may find counselling helps or there may be a bereavement group in your area where you can go and talk to people who understand how you feel, it really does help to talk to other people about the person you’ve lost.

I hope you find some help , your mum was in your life a long time and you will miss her.

Take care J x

Hi am alan i lost my partner jayne in november and it would of been her birthday today and i miss her everyday like you do your mam and it the little things i miss most not recieving a text or been able to send one to her and i was struggling like you are but my disabled adult son came to live me full time since march helped me cope a bit better but i do miss jayne everyday and we should of had more years together she would of been 55 today and all i can advice is talk to a best friend or ask for counselling as when you bottle things up it makes you worse and if you wanted to message me if feeling a bit upset your welcome too, i know not alot but i would like you to if you feel it will help you when your feeling upset about your mam.

Hi Alan

Just wanted to say you are in my thoughts today as we have messaged before and I know this is not an easy one for you. It will be over soon though, take the day in little chunks and it seems to pass better. Enjoy your lovely son as well and raise a glass to Jayne tonight or at lunchtime, or both.

Kind regards
Mel

Thanks i will and just glad he here as i feel nobody thinking about what day it is or just avoiding saying anything so not to upset me

I understand fully. I lost my mum in December. I miss her every day and am truly heartbroken. I understand exactly how you feel. She was my best friend. It’s so hard as yourself so alone and scared. I don’t know what to say to make it feel better…Don’t think anyone can. We just have to take each day as it comes and do what we think they would tell us to. I hope to see her again one day until then will do best.i can…tears just have to fall. I hope time heals a little for both of us yet I don’t want to wish time away as it takes me further from her. Grief is the price we unfortunately pay for love. Please look after yourself and remember what she would say to you. Sending lots of love your way xx

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