My beautiful daughter died suddenly 3 months ago. She was 20years old and lived with Spina Bifida and Hydrocephalus. She had a complication with a shunt and she was gone. She was the absolute light of my life and I feel every day that passes I lose more and more of myself. I feel like an outsider looking at a world that is still turning but for me I’m frozen.
I have to hold everything together for my two younger children, so on the outside I probably look like I’m doing ok. I feel like I’m silently falling to pieces.
I miss her so much everyday. I just want to hear her voice and hold her hand.
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Hello Catherine 9, so sorry for the loss of your daughter, children are so precious, I have 2 adult children, I can’t even imagine your loss, i know its hard trying to keep it together, especially for your other children,..i lost my husband in March, i know how you feel, in the inside you’re dying, i also have to appear as if im doing ok, but its hard. I usually cry when im alone..i hope you have support from other family members or friends, its hard dealing with everything yourself, sometimes even just getting up in the morning is a challenge.. i hope posting here helps you unload your feelings. We all here understand. Take care, may God strengthen and comfort you and your family during this difficult time.
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Thank you for this message. I’m so sorry about the loss of your husband. Crying alone seems to be part of my daily routine. I feel like I’m constantly carrying a weight in my chest or a scream that can’t escape. I think I’m living in survival mode and I’m completely lost.
My family have been amazing and my friends but I don’t seem to be able to let go in front of them.
Hope you’ve got lots of support too. It’s good to be able to put my real thoughts down somewhere, to people who really understand.
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Hi Catherine, yes its hard confiding in people who haven’t lost a close family member, they just don’t understand how deep the pain is, they’ve left a hole in our lives that will never be filled again. I think with time we’ll focus more on the happy memories we had with our loved ones. Im glad you do have support from family..i also have an amazing family who have been very supportive. Please keep reaching out whenever you want. Take care and God bless you 
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