Struggling

I’m struggling at the moment has its coming up to the 1st anniversary of losing my husband feel so anxious all the time I have to keep busy but struggle to sleep its a long day and night with little or no sleep :sleeping:

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Lisa,
I felt the first anniversary was worse than the day hubby passed, think it’s a reality check along with the build up to it- but I’m 17 months on but it does get easier , more manageable - still shit - think I’m more accepting & Doing my best.
Today I had tears in the lift in Asda over a bunch of flowers, not the best start to the weekend - -
Lack of sleep magnifies things out of proportion sometimes so maybe you could get help with that.
Take care
G. X

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Hi Lisa,
I haven’t lost a partner but have lost a lot of people in my short life. I am 16 and when I was 11, my 13 year old cousin killed himself, and I haven’t been the same since. The only thing I’ve ever found to help really is speaking about him, as simple as it sounds. Whether it’s speaking about specifically how you feel and how you’re experiencing grief, or speaking about random, small, slightly ‘meaningless’ memories. It’s so painful but it helps to feel their presence, even if only in memory.
Sending you my love :heart:

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Hi Kikibarreto. That’s a great post, especially from one so young. You are absolutely right about talking about your feelings and memories, I think its absolutely essential. I talked to anyone who would listen (and a few who didnt want to!) Some people want to change the subject, because they think we will get upset, but that has the opposite effect doesnt it! You cant hide or bury grief, because it doesn’t get resolved, it keeps coming back. Well done, keep talking, but try to replace sad memories with happy ones, happy ones will drive out the sad ones.

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Hi Lisa, I take a 12mg Melatonin tablet each night and a St Johns Wort tablet from time to time when I feel anxious. Nick
The most common melatonin side effects include:

Headache
Dizziness
Nausea
Drowsiness

St Johns Wort side effects (must read) Wear sun block outside

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Hello Lisa6298

I’m struggling too at the moment. I am so sorry for your loss of your husband. I lost my daughter last August. The build up to the anniversary feels enormous like the biggest wave is about to crash. I too am trying to keep busy so so I don’t think too much. Everyone else seems in my family seems oblivious too it…or maybe they are dealing with it in their own way.

I suppose we will cope and get through it and probably won’t know how. Take care

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