Hi @Annie26
Hopefully you’re having an ok day. The reason I’m writing this is because my nana was called Annie, my mam’s mam. I’m thinking of doing a family tree, hoping it will help put in prospective the process of life and death, it sounded like a good idea last night but this morning I feel I’m back to square one, sorry if this sounds like a ramble but I’m struggling today 
Take care xx
Hi
No you weren’t rambling bless you.
It is so hard especially as it would be my mums birthday this Sunday then Mother’s Day the next!
I had a bad night, so been awake since 4 then as I’m struggling so much I had a session with a mental health nurse this morning so I’m exhausted.
How long have you lost is it your mum?
Muu I be is 14 years but 17 really as she was severely braindamaged in an accident with me. I have not allowed myself to grieve as my father blamed me totally for the accident he was a cruel controlling abusive man. But I took the blame he gave me and held it I still to this day feel like I caused my mums death.
Sorry I’m rambling
Take care bless you xxx
I also feel the same i lost my beloved Mom in October
Oh bless you I feel for you. I’ve only been on here since Tuesday evening.
I’m so sorry for your loss was it sudden may I ask? Don’t worry if you don’t want to answer that.
I haven’t many accessible photos of my mum but I have a couple. I can’t go to her grave because my father is buried there too and I can’t bear it.
I carry a lot of guilt around I’m getting help soon hopefully to help.
Have you had grief counselling?
Xxx
1 Like
Thank you for replaying.she was had cancer and mom was in hospital.and she died peacfully thier .she was all had family. And my bes frind died befor mum…i had lots of loosses in my life.i miss her.i feel i cant face anyvany to heal it.she past away 3 month ago i dont like the werkend i fel so lonly every one has a life and with friends or family. You email me any time…this is my story.am going to have counceling.
I’m so sorry for your loss and the unbearable situation you find yourself in. I’m glad that you’re getting help and you certainly deserve it, you actually sound very brave with what you have endured I know you won’t feel like that because none of us on here does. I also know what its like to be controlled by an abusive man, not my dad, an ex, but that’s another story.
My mam passed on 15th January this year (blue Monday) it’s still very raw and im struggling. I have just started reading a book about grief though that although it won’t be the magic cure I’m looking for, I’m hoping it will help, someone on here recommended it. Don’t hesitate to message anytime, It helps to share, sending hugs 
, take care xx
Oh bless you it’s only weeks that you’ve lost your mam so raw you are probably still in shock. Thank you for saying I’m brave you are right I don’t feel it at all. I suffer from complex PtSD I’ve had so much trauma so many deaths including losing my husband when he was 41 he drowned so they say whilst on holiday in Ibiza 21 years ago in May but I gave my suspicions that he may have taken his own life and that’s hard to bear too so many unanswered questions.
Was your dear mum poorly?
Thank you for your kind words and your hugs sending them back to you xxx
Bless you
You’ve been through the mill, I totally understand how you feel. As well as my mum dying 14 years ago my husband died suddenly 21 years ago this May leaving me a widow to our children if 14 and 12. I too lost 2 lovely people friends suddenly I’ve had so much loss so I know how you must be feeling.
Good we’ve got this place to chat take care love and hugs Annie xxx
Hi @Missingmom123
I’m so sorry for the loss of your mum and your friend. I feel the same about weekends when everyone is happily going about their business, even my own family seem to be getting on with things, the difference is though me and my mums bond was so close which in time will be a source of comfort, but not yet. Xx
Bless you too Annie, sending hugs and hope you keep posting xx
Hi pixie
So we ste on same plane.do you get nightmares. Ive been getting them latly alot.xx
Hiya
@Missingmom123
I don’t get nightmares but I use meditation to get to sleep and I’m also on medication, who knows either could be the reason or it’s just not one of my "symptoms " a lot of my symptoms are physical like my forehead is in a vice and tension over the bridge of my nose and I feel totally stuck with no motivation at all. Although I do tend to feel a little easier from about 3pm onwards. Do you recognise any of these feelings?
Sending you a hug
Take care 
Hi
I have very bad dreams and nightmares some night. I had a bad dream last night which woke me feeling really anxious at 4 and couldn’t rest after that.
I feel for you that you are having nightmares they are horrible. I think it’s natures way of trying to sort out all the pain and loss. Xx
Hi
Am same i meditate before sleep.and i take medacation.wich blew me up.xx
Did you stop the medication or are you still on it? Hopefully in time they’ll lessen 
Hi pixe
Sorry for late replay.il always get back to you.am sorryvyour struggling as well.it like loosing like a mum.!! Hope we be posting each other we could find healing and acceptance of loosing them.xx