Struggling

It’s been 6 weeks since my husband died. It was his birthday on Monday so it has been a very tough week. I have bad days and worse days, and today is one of the worse days. Crying constantly because he is not with me. In my mind I can’t accept his death as I don’t believe he should have died. He was in hospital for an operation and then died 2 days later. The post mortem could not find cause of death, so still with coroners having further investigations on tissue samples. I feel like a huge part of who I am died with him, and that I’m now going through the motions of living but will never be “ok” again. It’s awful being in the house without him as he was there all the time due to working from home. My parents asked me if I wanted to sell the house sooner rather than later (I will have to sell at some point) but just said it’s not actually the house, it’s the fact he’s not in it, and that feeling won’t change wherever I am.

I go back to work after Easter weekend, I don’t know if it’s too soon or not, and won’t until I go back. Trying to get some “normality” back, but I am not looking forward to it. Already anxious about it.

hi Mel

I’m so sorry about your husband. Mine passed 6 months ago and I tried going back to work for some normality but it went pear-shaped so im not back just yet. his business wasn’t straight forward and I was never involved in this until he passed and there were lots of things to sort out financially and is still ongoing.
so for work I wouldn’t push yourself until you’re ready and maybe just do a little and see how it goes.
Sending you hugs but again don’t push yourself and most importantly be kind to yourself.
xx

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So sorry for your loss, I understand how you feel. I lost my husband and I can’t get over the silence in the house, we had no children just my husband and I. I hope you can get some help with the ongoing investigations,it must be awful for you.

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Thank you. Thankfully, work have been amazing. I have some amazing managers. And am on -phased return for 4 weeks, but even then they have said if this doesn’t work we will re evaluate, so at least there is no pressure or expectations x

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Same. We had no children together. He had a son who will be 18 this year, and lives with his mum. So I completely get it, the silence is deafening x