Struggling

Coping with bereavement
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I recently lost my dad and am heart broken. I feel everyday is such a struggle and fighting to get your head above water?
Will this ever get easier as I just can’t see it and can’t imagine feeling happy again.

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Hello @Amanda80 ,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling heartbroken. I’m so sorry to hear about your dad. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support. In the meantime, you may wish to look at these Sue Ryder resources which might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,
Alex

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Hi Amanda80,

Firstly, bless you for sharing this such courage on your part. It is natural to feel this way. I lost my best ever friend on Christmas Day which was totally unexpected! Not the same as losing your dad, but I know a little of how you feel. I have no easy answers, but am trying to be kind to myself is small ways, making a cup of tea, eating a piece of chocolate, or going for a trundle in my power chair. Not much I know, but it helps to ease the hurt a little. I have also started a scrapbook with photos and diary entries so I can remind myself of all the happy times we shared. Don’t know if any of this helps, but we are all gently here for you. Take great care of yourself, Feeling so for you. J

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Hi wheelieman thankyou for your message and kind words it means a lot for someone to reach out.
I’m so sorry for your loss too it’s such a difficult time of the year also.
My dads was also sudden and unexpected to I find it’s hard to accept they are gone.
It’s the most painful time I have ever experienced but hope in time it’s easier to deal with. We just got to try and keep strong and make sure we get support from others.

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Hi Amanda,

Thanks for that, so helpful. There is definitely a sense of utter disbelief! I guess I need to do something practical cause I Don’t like to think too much! Maybe that is my challenge!

I lost my favorite brother when very young and still miss him. On refection I found the mere passage of time alone did not help much. I only found healing with the right support and loving kindness. The sense of loss is still very much with me, but kind healing has taught me to gently cherish all those I have lost, and that is what eases my journey.

Because of my particular circumstance I have lost many lovely people. From childhood to date. I hope I have not given the impression that dealing with grief is easy, I know it is not. Rather, I seek to share with folk the healing that has helped me.

Take great care,
J

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I know it’s a very scary new experience for me. Every day feels hard to get through but I try to soldier through. It’s hard i want things to get easier but feel guilt and feels wrong to let go if that makes sense.
Wow so sorry that you lost your brother so young I can’t imagine how hard that must have been.
I’m told it gets easier but all I keep saying is a can’t imagine it being possible right now.
The funeral is 3 weeks away and still have to go through that so is very early days. It’s just so hard.

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Take each day at a time, small steps leading to bigger ones. If you break down don’t worry it’s ok to cry. I can’t put a time period on it, it takes time. I lost my mum last August 23 and I’m still getting tearful on some days. I hope it helps you on here, you will find comfort on here knowing you not alone with your grief for your dad. Just take your time with it all ok!

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Hey Keith thank you for reaching out. You’re right I try to take each day at a time as thinking too far a head panics me. I often burst into tears as anything from something on the tv, a song or something I see all seems to revert back to a memory or just make me think of him its hard to think about anything else.
I’m sorry to hear you lost your mum last year, it’s heart breaking. I hope you have had a lot of support in helping you heal. It’s so nice to get support from here and know you are not alone.

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I understand grief can be very random, a film, a piece of music, even something on Tik Tok. Memories are everywhere

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Hi Keith,

Just a quick thank you for your messages. So helpful and supportive. J

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I agree the support means so much. It’s so comforting.

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