Hi I’m new here and tbh I never though it would be a place that I would be I’m 42 and suddenly 3 weeks ago I found myself a widow with a baby on the way my husband went to work in the morning suffered a massive stroke and never came home I had so many decisions to make in the following days that just keep going around my mind I can’t stop thinking about them I had to bury him yesterday and now everyone has disappeared and I’m on my own I don’t know what to do next everyone keeps tell me how strong I am and how well I’m coping but it’s a show the min I’m on my own and the door is closed I sob uncontrollably I’m left with the thing we wanted the most (a baby of our own) and now he’s gone and this little nugget will never no his/her dad I just want to crawl into a hole and just be with him
Hi ,
I am so sorry. So so sorry for your loss. I just lost my dad , he was 59 I know it’s so different but I know the pain.
The way I described it to friends was the feeling of being robbed, robbed of the biggest part of my life, I imagine this is how you also feel.
I know it doesn’t feel like it but you are so strong, you have gotten this far, your growing a tiny human and your here getting support.
If you ever need someone to talk to then I’l be always happy to listen.
Thinking of you,
Becca
Dear Clair79
I am so so sorry and sometimes there are just no words and this is one of those times.
I so hope you have someone around you that is able to give support and many hugs too.
I absolutely know the heartache and pain you will be feeling right now, it is unbearable however you have a little bundle of joy who is completely unaware of what has happened and they need you and always will.
I can’t imagine how you go forward but you do have to. Just one step at a time.
There might be someone on here that has been in the same position, losing their husband while expecting and maybe they can offer better support however my heart goes out to you and I send a virtual hug. 
Clair79, I am so, so sorry that you find yourself in this group that none of us wanted to be in. My husband died suddenly at the age of 50 so I know how the unexpected kicks the wind out of you and makes it hard to breathe. My children are older so that is a different situation to your own. You can sign up to counselling here, with Cruse or through your GP. At the moment you need to take it a breath at a time and that is hard enough. Refugeingrief.com is also good - written by someone who lost her partner suddenly. Take help and support from anyone you can and tell people that you need their support. Sometimes people just don’t know what to do but ask - you need the support so that you can do your best for your baby. Keep posting here - we will listen and support where we can. Sending hugs
Hi @Clair79, I am so sorry to read about your husband. It’s really good you’ve been able to reach out to others here and describe how you are feeling.
As Jules points out above, Sue Ryder offers a free bereavement counselling service. It can often be a lot easier to talk with a professional counsellor about your feelings. If you would like to find out more, you can do so here.
Cruse Bereavement offer a helpline, email support, counselling and support groups through their local services. Contact them on 0808 808 1677, helpline@cruse.org.uk or via their website
We have some useful resources on our website, including this article which I thought you might find helpful.
I do hope you find our community a source of comfort and support. Keep reaching out and please know that we’re always here for you.
Take care,
Mick
Online Community team
Thank you I will reach out to them I think I need to cos I ain’t coping with this at all at the moment and I need to for our daughter and this baby I’m carrying thank you all for your lovely comments end thank you for showing me some direction xx