My name is Christina and I lost my beautiful son in 2019, he was 30 years old and I find it hard every minute of the day. As you know being a mother and having other children you have to stay strong for them while dying inside. My son was estranged from us for many years mainly just phone calls here and there. He took drugs and it went from bad to worse. He ended up in prison on remand and this is where he hung himself. I was due to go a visit but couldn’t on the day he asked due to work. The great comfort I have before he passed was that we wrote letters to each other and the love was still there. He felt that he let’s me down as I feel the same about him. He was funny, caring and so handsome and loved his nieces and nephews. He has 2 daughters and the youngest was conceived before he died so he never knew of her. How do I go on being the strong one. Xx


Dear @Christina65

Welcome to the Community. I am sorry to hear of the loss of your son.

There is an organisation called Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide that contains helpful and useful information. You can go on their website to see and find if there is a local support group in your area.

You can also get support by emailing them on You too can connect with members here who have been in a similar situation as yourself.

Please continue to reach out and take care.


Hi Christina
Im so very sorry to hear of your loss. There are no words to convey how the loss of a child feels, I lost my son last year and it feels like part of my soul died with him.
Your letters from your son must mean the world to you, its so good to have the love in writing.
You don’t have to stay strong, and nor should anyone expect you to. Just allow yourself to feel what you feel, when you feel it and if you need to break down, do so. You dont ever have to be strong after losing your child, no matter how big, how handsome or how old, a mum always sees her baby x
Sending much love and my deepest sympathies to you.