Sudden death of my husband

I lost my husband very suddenly on 1st December. We walked into A/E, he never came back out. He suffered a massive heart attack and cardiac arrest. He was 58, we’d been together since we were 15 and married for 37 years. I am totally numb, trying to be strong for the family. I have a daughter, who gave us a beautiful Granddaughter and a son (military). I’m a Theatre nurse and work where my husband died. We also lost our oldest son (2003) RTA, he died instantly at the scene, but was taken also to my place of work. I’m planning to return to work in a couple of weeks, I work part time 2 days/week. I just feel so alone, sad and numb. Thank you for listening.

Dear Pamela

I wish there was something I could say, but there are no words, except sorry that you are in this same place.

I lost my husband to a RTA in September, he had recently turned 60. We also have a beautiful one year old grandson - my husband was devoted to him.

Please keep posting. Thinking of you. Take care.

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Hi Sheila
Thank you so much for your kind words, very much appreciated! I just can’t and don’t want to talk to anyone (phone calls, texts etc)
Sending love and hugs to yourself :heart:

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So sorry for your loss
So unfair
Lost my husband December 5th to Covid
Heartbreaking it really is
Take care xx

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Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment and your kind words. So sorry for your loss too. Sending Love and hugs :heart:

Hi Pamelamay
So sorry for your loss , please keep posting on here as i and many others have found there are many of us on this sad and sometimes lonely journey .
It does help to connect with people who simply ‘get’ how we are feeling on particular days.I’m almost 17 weeks into my journey and thought i was ‘getting there slowly’ till i woke up last tuesday in floods of tears and my coping mechanism failed miserably.
I take each day as it comes, some better than others but i have a friend who did this exact journey almost 9 years ago and she is my rock,understands every emotion i have gone through …i’m not sure i could have coped without her help & support.
Don’t be afraid to reach out & talk on here anytime sending love and hugs
Dinky xxxx

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Thank you, means a lot :heart:

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Pamelamay I’m so sorry for your loss . Your story is very similar to mine . Lost my husband 5 months ago tomorrow age 56 to a heart attack, he was taken very suddenly and I was totally devastated.
I have cried every day since September 1st and some days are worse than others. I feel so scared, alone, and pained by the whole thing.
You have come to the right place to get comfort and advice by the best people as we too are feeling just as you are .
Sending hugs and keep talking :heart:

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Thank you and I’m so sorry for your loss too. It’s a nightmare and really overwhelming. I’m totally numb and scared x

Pamelamay you will have lots of other emotions too feeling angry, lonely, scared,these are all part of the grieving process we have and need to go through . The only consolation I have is that Rob didn’t suffer from taking ill to actually passing away was 5 hours and he didn’t get out of resus it was good for him as it was quick and very well managed by the hospital staff team but totally shocking and devastating for me and the kids .

I too lost my husband on the 1st December but to cancer he was diagnosed 6 weeks before , I totally feel your pain I too don’t want to talk to anyone. We were together since we were 17 and married for 30years with two gorgeous boys x He was only 55 we had so many plans and now I feel so lost without him x

So sorry for your loss
Pain so unbearable isn’t it
Life just doesn’t seem fair

So sorry for your loss of your husband and son. My husband also died of a heart attack and cardiac arrest at the hospital I used to work at as a midwife. He was 56 and we had been together for over 30 years. It happened nearly a year ago now. My eldest son (a Dr) and I started CPR at home on him and worked with the paramedics but the damage was too big.
I think being a nurse / midwife has added a layer to my grief where I have almost watched myself grieving at times. The numb, shock time when I slept so badly lasted for nearly 4 months and then I gradually started to move forward with some bad days and other better ones. Lots of walking, connecting with family and friends and keeping busy helped. Luckily I don’t work in the hospital now but I hope your colleagues will give you the support you will need when you are ready to go back. Please don’t under estimate the effort needed to work again and especially in health care. Now I feel that I can have a future, it’s just very different from what I had planned with my husband. I’m still taking life one step at a time. Be kind to yourself. X

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