Sudden Lost of my Mum

I lost my mum suddenly in February, she was only 57 and had had a fall and a bleed on the brain. I am struggling so much to cope day to day. Thankfully I have 4 small people to keep me going but the lack of sleep is certainly catching up on me.

I hope that in time it gets a little easier but I am really struggling at the moment. I have to go and sort though all her things with my sisters next weekend and the thought just fills me with tears and dread.

No real question to ask etc just reaching out to anyone happy to listen and who understands what I am going though.



I’m so sorry to hear you lost your Mum so suddenly in February, it must have been such a shock for you. It’s understandable that you’re struggling to cope at the moment and not sleeping very well either.

My Mum died 4 years ago and I was devastated, she was my best friend. It does get easier with time and you learn to adjust to a different way of living. She would always be the first person I would want to call if I had any exciting news or if I had a problem. I guess I’ve had to become more self-sufficient and independent.

I do understand what you’re going through, you’re not alone. My Dad and I sorted through my Mums clothes together. I too was dreading it. It was a bit of a surreal experience. We were absolutely ok one minute, then 1 of us would start crying, then we’d be laughing about something funny my Mum had said or done. We just rolled with whatever emotion came over us.

Try not to put pressure on yourself and try to be kind to yourself. It’s good to have a focus of 4 small people but it’s also important to focus on yourself. I remember having to make a real effort to eat properly, not just soup, toast & cereal. It’s also important to treat yourself along the way - I love candles so I would always make sure the first thing I did when I got home was to light a really lovely smelling candle & sit down with a cup of tea. Small things can provide a sense of comfort.

Please keep talking to us, we’re always happy to listen & take care for now. Trudy x

I lost my Mum 3 years ago to mouth cancer & watched her deteriorate before my eyes feeling helpless. This last year I’ve watched my Dad slowly die of an unknown Cancer, he finally let go on the 11th Feb. I know sudden death must be such a shock but believe me it beats watching a loved one waste away in pain before your eyes. We have more compassion for animals!

hi Kelly
first of all I send my condulances to you
I also lost my mum in February
And I can reach out to you regarding sorting through mum’s personal belongings it will be hard and pain full but do it a bit at a time and remember good and happy memories and that will help you
I wish u all the best x

Hi Kelly

I am so sorry. It’s so hard. I still struggle and my mum diedb4 months ago. We just learn to live with it and life takes over. I feel for you sorting her house it’s hard. In fact soul destroying. Try and remember fun things whilst doing it. Remember her live for you and that she would have had to do this so would understand. Thinking of you xx