My partner died suddenly at home three weeks ago. I came home from work and found his dead. I guess I’m just looking for some support. I feel completely traumatised. I know he’s definitely dead but somehow it doesn’t feel real. He’s so absent. I feel like I’m being tortured.
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Hi, I’m so sorry for your loss. Finding your loved one like that is shocking and traumatic. That’s the way I found my partner nine months ago but I still have lapses and hope it’s all just a nightmare. It sounds crazy as I know he’s dead. but it’s a form of escape for me.
In the early days and months your head will be full of white noise you can expect memory problems and brain fog. I thought I was going mad but it’s actually normal to experience those things. I hope you have support through this terrible time
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Hi @Anna18
I am sorry for you had to find your partner like that is such a shock. My husband died suddenly heart attack 9 months ago . The first few months are terrible. You will feel numb and won’t be able to focus on anything. Take it one day at a time , I hope you have family and friends to support you . Look after yourself
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Dear Anna I am sorry to hear you have been through such a terrible trauma. Losing our loved ones is the most horrific thing that will ever happen to any of us. Not only does it feel physically painful but it breaks our spirit too. I hope you have plenty of support around you from friends and family which I would encourage you to accept any help that is offered. You now need all the support you can get. I hope you find some solace here on this site where everyone understands the pain and suffering of a bereavement.
Wishing you all the best
Tom
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Dear Anna,
welcome to a club that nobody wants to be a member of!
What happened to you is an absolute nightmare, extremely traumatizing and heartbreaking.
Especially the first months are extremely painful, so many emotions swirling around in your mind, the heart being broken and the mind totally numbed.
Here people do understand your grief, please feel free to post whenever you want to share your grief!
May God bless, guide and comfort you!
Kind regards - Joe
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Hello Anna, so sorry for your loss. It is very painful losing our partner, .we go through so many emotions, were numb, in disbelief, nothing seems to matter..it will slowly start getting better, counseling or bereavement groups might help you, and posting here on this site. We’re here for you. We get it. Take care and God bless you 
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My loss was sudden too, I’m sorry you had to find your partner like that. It will slowly get better. Thinking it isn’t real, It is your way of protecting yourself. It’s coming on two months for me, remembering those first weeks
Go for walks, or even drives with the music on. Distract yourself as best you can, and remember depth of pain equals breadth of love. I actually didn’t realize how much I loved the man I lost. I hope you have some support around you!
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Hi Anna, I’m here as my partner of 20 years passed away suddenly and unexpected 3 weeks ago of a heart attack, we were planning where we going on holiday next year, we had so many plans for this year. I came home from work to find him dead on my sofa, it was a traumatising shock, I’ve got my daughter who’s 21 and 1 friend who visits occasionally, he was my soul mate and we spent everyday, when i wasn’t at work, together, so i’m so lonely, its left a huge unfillable gap in my world. I have to go to work everyday as I’ve got a mortgage to pay but I wish I could just curl up and forget about the world, it’s so hard having to carry on as normal without him, it doesn’t feel real, and I don’t know what Im supposed to be doing, how I’msupposed to be feeling or how to manage what I am feeling, I had 4 other bereavement over the space of 10 years, parents and grandparents and he was there he just knew how to help me cope and get through it. So what I’m trying to say is I can empathise with you, I don’t know if you’re able to but Im happy to chat with you anytime you need 
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Dear Sarah,
welcome to the club nobody wants to be a member of!
The first weeks / months are especially traumatizing, countless emotions swirling through your mind, one feels hollow and numb.
Your beloved partner is watching out for you from Heaven, patiently awaiting your reunion.
In the meantime he wants you to take good care of yourself.
If you don’t feel like eating, which is absolutely understandable, I’d recommend some high-calorie drinks as a supplement.
These drinks supply your body with the nutrients it needs, thus conserving your strength and energy.
They come in a wide variety of tastes, either ready-made or as a powder to mix with milk.
Sending some strength to you, may God bless, protect, guide and comfort you!
Kind regards - Joe
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Dear Sarah I am sorry to hear about your partner. It is such a horrific position to be in and you have to carry on with life whether you feel able or not but I think it’s important to talk about our feelings otherwise we hold everything in and that isn’t healthy. I hope you find some solace here where everyone understands the pain and suffering caused by a bereavement. My lovely wife died on Christmas day after two years of cancer treatments and I have found this site to be a godsend.
Wishing you all the strength you will need
All the best Tom
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Morning Sarah
I am sorry for your loss I know how hard it is to find your love one like . My husband died suddenly of a heart attack 9 months old . Like you we had many plans all gone in an instant.
The first few months are the hardest. Shock, anger , disbelief so many emotions swirling round your head
If you haven’t already done so visit your gp
Eat , sleep and drink
Take it day by day
We are all on this grief journey together
Just in different stages,
I have found this site to be a lifeline, I hope you will too
Post when you are up to it
Look after yourself
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So sorry Sarah. You will be disoriented and in a fog for awhile. Having to work may seem insurmountable, but it will distract you during this harrowing, sad time. If it is really too much, can you get some time off? The aloneness, is the worst imo. Every day you go about your day so as to tell your love, your soulmate. Now, who do you tell, who relects you and makes you whole? You have to love yourself now. One day at a time, one cry at a time. You will make it through, and everyone here is going through this and here to help and lend an ear!
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Who reflects you and makes you whole’ so eloquently said. We miss ourselves too in the aching chasm of our Beloved loss. The aloneness’ I am only lonely for my person, the love of my life; soul mate husband,no one else but the world we inhabit now is quiet, his voice our voice’ and sounds of the interior remain
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That is so beautifuly put @Pooka1968 - that is exactly how a I feel
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