Lighter nights are here , warmer weather but my depression and anxiety feels worse. People say to me you will feel better when the lighter nights are here , when the sun is shining , when you can sit out in the garden . But it doesnt help at all , anyone else feel the same way ? xx
4 Likes
Hello @Angie4 ,
I’m so sorry for the loss of your Mum. Thank you for sharing this with us. I’m just giving your thread a gentle, “bump” for you - hopefully someone will have some thoughts to share.
Take good care,
Alex
1 Like
I think it depends on what your thoughts are Angie.
I had a time when I was alone soaking up the sun, because I was grieving for my wife, my thoughts were all negative. When I had no one there to get me out of the pain the weather made it worse.
Now fourteen months on I have realised I have to find the beauty in the world around me, including the weather!
Someone said to me that “thoughts are like leaves floating down a stream. Just acknowledge them and let them go”. It has taken me time but I can accept my good and bad thoughtd and know they will pass.
I found talking and being open about my feelings helped. Up until my wife passed I was a private person, now I more than willing to chat about anything and to listen.
I hope you find some peace Angie. x
2 Likes
@joeb40 and I have trodden the same path, and finished up in pretty much the same place. 14 months for me as well.
Feelings are generated by thoughts. Control the thoughts and the negative feelings go away.
There are options for doing this, medication or therapy ( eg mindfulness or cbt). I used hypnotherapy which was highly successful . Joe’s leaves on a stream is a real example of mindfulness.
There is peace and happiness out here, be positive and confident.
1 Like
Hi Tykey,
It’s been a while and I have you to thank for putting me on to Will the hypnotherapist. It sounds dramatic but he was a life saver to me, he helped me understand I wasn’t losing my mind and there was still hope and even happiness to be had.
I am happy you are well, we are proof that there is still a life to be had, however different it may be, life goes on and in memory of my wife I will live it. x
2 Likes
Hi @joeb40 . Absolutely delighted it helped you a lot, and your life, like mine, has meaning again.
May your stress bucket remain ever empty (in joke, folks, sorry!
). My life is happy again, Ive turned into a hybrid of Winnie the Pooh and Foggy Dewhurst!!
1 Like
There is no pleasure in sitting in the garden alone , its so tough doing anything alone . It just doesn’t feel right. Thank you for your kind words , thinking of you x
Thank you so much x
Thank you for your thoughts , its a difficult road to travel. I have always been a private person and still am to a certain degree but i am trying hard to engage more with people when i manage to go out . Take care x
I wish i could get used to my own company but even after two years i still hate it . Takers are horrible , i hope oneday soon someone will treat you to a meal or coffee.
Take care .
Im still in the miserable life phase , cant get out of it though i want to at some point .
Take care .