I’ve decided to have a tattoo …I’m going to have the letter N on my right shoulder with a small bird just above , flying upwards …My son Nick would have been 21 now . He died almost 4 years ago and I think of him everyday . As I get older I’m more inclined to act , not on impulse , but on things I want to do which when younger , would have remained as thoughts . Death reminds me just how fleeting life on this earth is .
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That sounds a good plan Paul. I feel that we have every right to feel and do whatever we want to. You said your son Nick would be 21, my heart goes out to you. I can hardly believe it is almost 4 years for me too, since my daughter passed and things are so hard, just keep on “pretending” every day. I know that it won’t get much better, this is life now, living without our children. It’s not fair. Have your tattoo and be proud x
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That sounds good Paul. I agree you should do what ever you feel you want to. Losing our children Paul and Bir and everyone must be the worst so anything we feel helps and honours our children is ok.
It is 11 months for me since I lost my daughter. I cannot imagine the rest of my life without her. I continue for my son and understand the devastation I would leave behind me.
Strength to us all. Xxx
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Strength to us all. I echo that . I’ve got another son , James , he’ll be 24 next month , he’s my incentive to keep going . I hadn’t thought about the tattoo honouring Nick as you said , but it does, and it helps , and I’m grateful to you for articulating that . It’s an expression I guess of the struggle that we all have , making sense of Nicks death and my ongoing life .
What a lovely thing to have done…It shows to other people that our children are still very much alive to us, in our thoughts and mind where they will always be forever.xx
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He’s always in my head , I have his old student ID photo card in my wallet and soon he’ll be indelibly imprinted on my physical body for the rest of my life . I feel close to him. Thanks for your very kind words .
Hi Paul, yes you will, I understand what you mean. I carry my daughters photo in a locket I wear everyday and take her everywhere with me. No-one knows what these things mean to us and how they help. X
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Thanks for saying that . I completely agree . And the further away it gets from when they died , the more important it is to remain in close touch with them through photos , as well as memories …and in my case a tattoo 
Likewise I carry Christians photos in my wallet/purse… I am even using his mobile phone…silly, I know, but it makes me feel closer to him…
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Makes complete sense to me and I strongly suspect , to everyone on here . Anything that helps us, we need to grab it .
Well, I’ve had the tattoo , and I’m really pleased I did . Top of my shoulder so not visible to others unless I choose to, but I know it’s there, and that’s the point of having it done . Ive emailed a photo of it to Nicks email. Thanks for all the nice messages .