I spend my time searching for and reading these poems, and they bring me some sort of comfort, and I’d like to share them with you all. And today it’s raining again!
Teardrops and Rainbows
When sorrow comes into our lives. and tears of sadness fall
They never go unnoticed, God sees them one and all.
Our tears are very precious, in the eyes of our dear Lord.
He calls them up to special clouds where they are safely stored.
When these clouds are heavy laden from the weight which they contain,
Moisture falls upon to the earth and our tears come down as rain.
Then when the rain has ended, look to the sky above
And when you see a rainbow God is sending us His love.
He knows we all face sorrow and He knows we all feel pain.
That’s why He sends a rainbow after every tear filled rain.
I’ve gone through losing family members and friends and thought I knew what grief was, but I’ve never experienced the pain, heartaches and tears as much as I do now. i feel so alone and lost.
I can see his smiling face, hear his jokes and his lovely laughter, his eyes gazing so lovingly into mine.
I still can’t believe it and I just feel I can’t cope without him. I need him with me so much.
You are very welcome, I too have lost family members but the grief caused by losing your partner is something else. My husband died nearly 19 months ago, I found him on our bedroom floor he had died, we were lucky, we had had 59 years of marriage, previously we had had 3 years of going out together. Choose how old you may be, the grief is so intense you just feel that life as we knew it is over and indeed it is.
I do feel for you, take care and stay safe,
Mary x
Thank you again for kind words.
Oh God, how on earth are you coping with your devastating loss and such tragic circumsances?
You were so lucky to have shared your lives for 62 years. I only had 10 years with Alan and nowhere near enough. We weren’t married but we had the most beautiful relationship and greatest friendship I had ever known. I’ve never felt these feelings that I had for him with anyone else. He was so special. From the day we met I felt like I had known him forever. Now I have nothing.
The majority of the lovely people on here are suffering far more than me, but the pain is still
unbearable and unbelievable.
I have spent the afternoon looking through our wedding photo album. Cried and cried. Amongst the keepsakes are also our cards from our silver wedding anniversary. That was in 2007 and thought I would grow old with my husband. He had only turned 60 the year he died. Our 39th wedding anniversary tomorrow - not sure how I will get through it. We had planned to start a new chapter travelling as part of retirement when restrictions were lifted - that is now all gone.
Sorry you’ve had a bad day. Keepsakes are beautiful, but so heartbreaking when it’s still so fresh.
Where do all the tears come from?
My thoughts will be with you tomorrow. Will you be spending time with family or friends? Sometimes though you just want to be on your own to cry. People tell us to stay strong but it’s harder than they realise until it happens to them.
I’m still not ready to look at my keepsakes yet. I kiss his photo every morning and talk to him and shed yet more tears. I put a lot of cards etc. away the day Alan died, and I can’t remember where I put them. I’ll look for them when I feel ready.
Sadly yes, all plans for when this pandemic is over and looking forward to a brighter future are now gone.
How I feel at the moment, I don’t care if we don’t come out of lockdown. Can’t bear the thought of seeing happy couples hand in hand and I have nothing to look forward to. Does that sound selfish?
I had such great plans for today but had my Covid-jab brought forward to yesterday and have been poorly all night. Only recently got out of bed. I was so scared during the night - this is one of my greatest fears now, taking ill and being on my own.
The number of people who send me texts saying you have to stay strong, etc. They are not in my position and it would be nice if they could actually pick up the phone instead and actually speak to me. Some days I have no contact with anyone. Its not the same talking to your kids either as you do not want to burden them.
I have not been able to find my husband’s wedding ring since he died. I know he was not wearing it on the day so it has to be in the house somewhere but just alludes me. I find this so upsetting. The reality is I need my husband, its never going to happen and I am so heartbroken.
Hi Sheila
Hope your special day hasn’t been too upsetting for you and that you’re feeling a little better now after the jab. Was it your first or second one?
Yes, I do know how you feel about taking ill and being on your own, and especially having no contact with anyone for days. I haven’t got a great circle of friends so I don’t really get that many calls and texts. My daughter phones me throughout the day though.
I think people are frightened to phone because as soon as they say how are you it’s floods of tears and I can’t hold a proper conversation. My best friend just tells me she’s there and lets me cry my eyes out and to speak when I’m ready. She lost her mum a couple of years ago and I feel awful because it must hurt her to hear me cry without thinking about her own loss.
I do hope you find you husband’s wedding ring soon, that will be one less thing for you to worry about.
It was the first jab. My older brother suffered the same side effects but younger sister had none. Family genetics somewhere along the line. Had a cup of tea and feeling a little better.
My son said he will help me look for his dad’s wedding ring. Only problem is he doesn’t know I have collected my husband’s ashes and they are in the wardrobe. Will need to broach the subject if I cannot find the ring myself. I start to look through things then find I cannot do it and have to walk away.
I only have a very small circle of friends and this has shrunk even further since losing my husband because of insensitive comments from some. There is one best friend who calls weekly in addition to my husband’s best friend who also calls and I am grateful. But reality is they also have partners and when lockdown is over am sure they will (quite rightly) return to their normal daily lives. Have resigned myself that this is it now. Just trying to get through each day as best I can.