Warning guys, I’m very deep and getting deeper by the minute.
Since my mum died at the beginning of April I’m now worried sick about when my time comes.
My mum passing is the first time I have really experienced the death of a family member and it’s given me an irrational fear. Death is just so final.
I’m worried sick about leaving my daughter behind. I panic as she’s an only child and I worry that she won’t have any siblings to support her.
I’m petrified of what will happen after death. The unknown. I’ve always believed that when you die that’s it. It’s blackness but now it’s depressing me thinking we have to go through all this life of ups and major downs for nothing.
Surely I’m not the only one contemplating my own fate like this? Or am I? 
. Quite frankly I feel like I should be checking into an institution just typing this out.
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I lost my dad and husband 5 days apart in Dec 22, We have 3 daughters, I dream that when my time comes I will be beside my husband and family I have lost. It’s so difficult to understand dying and we all look at it differently but I hope you find your own peace, just now it’s all difficult and I won’t say it will get easier for a while but we need to take each day as it comes, I am watching my mum go through same as my dad did with dementia and life is difficult, you take care x
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No you’re definitely not the only one contemplating your fate. Since losing my OH seven weeks ago I have been thinking about my own fate too.
I’m the opposite to you though. I no longer fear death and in all honesty I’d be happy to go to sleep tonight and not wake up. I don’t have any children or anyone who depends on me, my mam and grandparents are also dead so I don’t have to worry about that side of things.
Life just seems unnecessary, cruel and full of suffering.
I also wonder what’s the point to it all?
I feel like if I die and there is absolutely nothing then I won’t be aware of it anyway, I won’t even know I ever existed, just absolute nothingness. On the other hand if there is something more after this then I’ll get to see everyone I’ve lost again in a better place so would probably get there and be happy to have left this place.
Death no longer feels like a scary thought.
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The only time I feel ok now is when I’m asleep…but if…as I believe…your consciousness cannot be destroyed…there may be something after this seemingly pointless existence…then great…either way…I’d be quite happy if I don’t wake up tomorrow… win win …all I know is what I am living now is torture 
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@LostLil
I said exactly the same to my friend last week when she’s asked ‘ what if there’s nothing & you don’t meet up with Bry’
I replied with ‘ then I’ll no nothing about it ‘
I’m the same too . Years Back I was so scared of death , it changed a little when I lost my Dad but now with Bry gone , I don’t fear, I get through each day thinking ‘ it could be me tomorrow’
The thing I fear the Most now is getting old xx
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MrsY, I used to be frightened by death, I’m not anymore, loosing Doug and my faith I know what’s waiting for me and I will see him again. He just has to be a little patient and wait for me to join him.
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Exactly, we’ll know nothing about it so that’s why I don’t fear death, obviously I don’t want to die a drawn out painful death but the actual dying part doesn’t bother me at all. We all have to die at some point and if at the end of our lives we just die and know nothing then does it even matter if we die young or old? We won’t know.
If there’s anything after this then we’ll go somewhere better anyway so again does it matter if we die young or old?
It’s the people who are left behind who have to find a way through.
I fear living to be really old way more than I fear dying.
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