Hi Susie.
You’re so right. The build up to the actual anniversary day was definitely worse than the day itself. I worked from home that day (work has been so understanding this past year) and just sat there watching the clock tick on to the time he passed away. I don’t know quite what I was expecting, but it ticked on and past and nothing was different. There was no change. I didn’t feel any better or worse. I hope that you managed OK on your Bill’s anniversary too. I feel so many parallels with you. Gary’s birthday was the week after the funeral, then our anniversary a couple of months later (26 years). It was very soon still, and you’re right, I was probably still in shock. Thank you for your words Susie - you make a lot of sense! That’s one of the strangest things about this thing called grief: I thought I would gradually, slowly get better at dealing with it, but it’s like a series of waves, up and down, up and down. You’re in my thoughts, especially today. x
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Bless you Lorraine We will be alright I think when you have loved and been loved it leaves an invisible mark on you which time will never erase .Its like a piece of armour and a great comfort .I am alright today ,I work in a supermarket weekends and was able to serve customers with flowers chocolates and Valenties cards without being upset. Quite surprised myself really as a few weeks ago I couldn’t sell custard tarts without welling up .They were one of Bills favourites I think I will write him a little letter this 1st Valentines day ,I dont know if I will do it every year but its what I need to do today .You take care lots of hugs xx
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