I lost my dear Dad in November. I feel like I’m living in a dream state, some days numb, some days angry, some days inconsolable. He suffered a massive heart attack on a holiday in Scotland and I spent 4 weeks by his bedside and managed to get him home to my house in Somerset for two weeks respite when he was discharged then he went back to his own home as he felt well enough to do so but only for one week before he sadly ended up back in A&E at the request of his heart failure nurse who said he just needed his meds tweaked by a cardiologist… there were so many failings when he got to hospital of which I was witness to. He wasn’t supposed to be admitted but was and this is playing on my mind day in and day out. His heart failure nurse said she just couldn’t understand how things happened the way they did. She didn’t want to upset me but she was frustrated after reading medical information and now I’m living with should he still be here… I’m literally heartbroken. I feel like I failed him… did I fight for him enough when he ended up back in hospital… he had such fantastic care in Scotland and it just wasn’t the same when he came back to England. I feel like I’m torturing myself every day. I miss his voice, we spoke every day. I just can’t seem to see how the days will get easier. My husband says things will get softer in time… not easier… just softer.
So sorry for your loss sadly i lost my dad over a year ago now an ya husband is rite it does get softer as time goes on u just have 2 take each day at a time thats all you can really do an unfortunately it doesnt surprise me about the hospital care because my dad was also let down by it as well.
Hi. I lost my Dad several years ago but I still think the same. Could I have done more? Talked to him more? Spoke to the nurses more so they knew how to look after him as they regularly left him without drinks. He had Multiple Sclerosis and couldn’t get his own drink or feed himself and if I wasnt there or my Gran then the staff just left the tea or food to go cold and wondered why he had urine infections due to not drinking, then they put him on nil by mouth and shoved a tube in his stomach which he told me one day he could taste the fluids so obviously something wrong there.
They didnt move him regularly so he ended up with a crick in his neck and had to have alot of physio. All these things I didn’t speak up about enough at the time and even though it has gotten easier I still think about him and wonder if there was more I should have done.
I do have a partner who is a wheelchair user with Cerebral Palsy, a 3 year old and a dog to keep me going now.