The loss of my mum

I lost my mum on 18th august this year, it was sudden and a shock. She was my everything , my friend the person i talked to everyday and saw 2 or 3 times a week. I have 2 brothers who werent as close to her as i was . The funeral was on the 20th of september and we still have the internment to do. I have a stepdad who has felt lost, and i have had no help from anyone with arrangements . At the funeral my brothers girlfriend was very disrespectful and from this i have fallen out with my brother whom i was very close to, i have recieved text messages that she was going to kill herself because of what i said but my brother seems to think thats ok as she had mental issues . I am numb and worried about my own mental health, nothing makes me happy at work i could cry, i feel my grieving process has been taking over by added pressure from them. I have taken a step back from them but feel the greif from the loss of my brother also. My heart aches and as much as i talk to people as im on my own , it doesnt seem to help.


Hello @Church,

I can see that you’re new to the community, so I wanted to say that I am so sorry for the loss of your mum that brings you here. Sadly, family conflict can be really common after the loss of a loved one, and I’m sorry it’s creating so much extra stress for you.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that may help right now.

You’ve mentioned feeling worried about your own mental health. It’s really good that you’ve recognised that you might be struggling right now. It may be a good idea to make an appointment with your GP and see what kind of support they can offer to help you through this.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,

My mum died a few days after yours,I’m not sure what I can offer to you.(just wanted to let you know you’re not on your own) The fact that you have had your sister in law be difficult for you resonated with me,I had similar with someone from within the family And feel the same way, that they have made the grief harder and I’m not able to navigate it as I thought i might (not that it seems is the way anyway!) It’s difficult enough without the added pressure.that person is now out of my life which has brought its own feelings on (disbelief,shock,sadness)
Hope things get easier for us both