The loss of my partner

I am finding it very hard to carry on without my partner he was my life and my world . He died unexpectedly at Christmas I don’t think people understand until they have been through something similar no matter how hard they try . Sometimes I just can’t see the point of carrying on without him . How can I cope without him we had our whole life ahead of us he was only 52 . My sister says I’ve just got to make the best of it but how can I when my life has gone . I am lost without him . It breaks my heart our dog still looks for him .

I keep going over that day again and again and it breaks my heart . He had ulcerated colitis and was injections and these caused him to have a blood clot . He had suffered so much.
What is the point of carrying on ?

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Hello Joandchris52,

I’m so sorry to hear about your partner. It sounds as though things are very tough at the moment and you are feeling overwhelmed.

I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you are feeling here, and I hope that you find the community a good source of support. Everyone here has experienced the loss of a loved one and will understand some of what you are going through.

Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here:

Another good source of help and support is Cruse Bereavement. They offer a helpline, email support, and counselling and support groups through their local services: 0808 808 1677,,

Take care,

Online Community team

I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine how you must be feeling. I too ahve been struggling with feelings of apathy towards my future due to the sudden loss of my sister. I would highly reccomend speaking to your GP about how you are feeling, there might be some medication that could help or also you may be referred into bereavement counselling services.
I know it must feel like an absolutely giant weight on your chest right now, but if you can focus on doing one small thing that is easy and an act of self care (having a cuppa, calling a friend, taking your dog for a walk) that may help. I have PTSD and very bad depression, when life feels overwhelming I try to grab on to that “one small thing”. I also write down a checklist of things I accomplished that day. Recently that checklist has been “I got out of bed. I had a shower. I ate some food”, the basics are so important and can be massive accomplishments when you feel so low. I also highly recommend having a chat with Samaritans, they’re there for all kinds of different people with different needs…theyre not just there for when you’re on the brink. their number is 116 123. They are always super kind and they’re there to listen with no judgement.
This community is here for you, we may never meet but I do care about you. You are not alone.
Sending strength and love.

Thanks for replying. I was supposed to be going counselling but it was cancelled because of the virus. I am glad I have found this community it gives me someone who understands

Thanks it’s nice to know people understand what I am going through

Dear Joan, I am so sorry that you lost your beloved Chris. I don’t know how you can cope. I don’t know how you can go on. It must be a really horrible situation to be in, when you had planned of spending so many years together, and now that will not happen.

But you will have to carry on, there is no other choice. For him. For your dog. For you. How you will manage this, I have no idea, but I hope you will, and I hope that the pain lessens on your journey. That some day you are able to live again, when that day comes, none of us knows, but hopefully there will come a day when you will be able to feel a bit happy. You deserve to. It’s what Chris would have wanted.