@Jmk Hi thanks for taking time to read my poem with u dedicate to EVERYONE in here..Yes I had to do something as we’re all in pain and we may even get through the day but the internal anguish cries out from with us.
I really do appreciate your response
May we all somehow navigate our way through this incredibly had time..my thoughts are with you too👍
Oh yes… I invisible scream… does hurt so much . I can’t bare the pain sometimes. Other times it just tells me …I’m still hear don’t you feel any better cos I will always be here ….. it then hits you when you don’t expect and you just want the person ….my mum back
@Sadandnumb Hi yes very true.. I sometimes feel like the pain is still living inside me even though there may be the odd moment when I don’t feel it as intense.
Then it comes in like a flood..I even dreamt my late mum last night as I was thinking about the fact that she’s gone before I fell asleep.
It’s really hard to come to terms that they have actually gone…just like you we just want them back.
I do appreciate you making the effort to read my poem which I have done it in acknowledgement of everyone on here.
A beautiful poem, Anthony. It sums up perfectly my thoughts, feelings and state of mind.
I lost my toddler grandson just before Christmas 2025. I definitely wish I could go back in time and hold him tightly in my arms just one more time. Some days go well. Other days, not so much. On those days, that ‘hidden agony’ hits me like a freight train. The pain is indescribable.
What angers me most is the natural order being upturned. Grandparents should not be outliving their grandbabies! One day, I’ll realise I’ve become used to my new reality although I know I will never fully recover.
@Lilith hi thanks for making time to read my poem ..I do appreciate this.
Yes you’re right as a grandchild (toddler age) hasn’t even really begun to live and they had their ‘whole life" ahead of them…unplanned…just waiting for then to grow into whatever destiny was waiting for them.
Must be soul destroying to loose them at this infant stage.How we perceive lifes general order is that they should be out living their grandparents.
This must leave a horrible sense of injustice and your having to experience your own bereavement trauma as well as sharing in the bereavement trauma of your own child whose lost this sweet little toddler as their parent😢.
Iam glad that you could relate to the words within the poem…it must of felt like looking into the mirror and seeing a reflection of your inner self.
I felt touched reading your post..this little bundle of childlike sweetness is no longer there for you all to love..cherish..fuss over..marvel at and see them develop and mature.
My heart goes out to you and the family at this heartbreaking time
Omg that’s just how I feel. It’s 3-1/2 years since my mum past. Mum was the only parent I’ve known(my dad died aged 25 6 weeks before I was born) I was so close to mum and at times I just don’t want to be here. Thank you so much for putting into words the grief the feeling of lost. Carrying on on the outside while screaming inside. X
@Sharon1993 Hi Sharon thanks for reading this poem..it means a lot as its written as a dedication to all know here as I know loosing a loved one is extremely traumatic and deeply painful.
Iam really that you can relate to the content here and I feel for you in your situation.
It must be really hard to even know how to navigate through you lifes demands and you’ve made it this far which I know mustn’t be easy.
May you find even a tiny temporary blessing in having read the words in this poem.
My thoughts are with you at this veey difficult time.
Im still having my bereavement counselling weekly and have shown your poem to my counsellor. Her comments were the words are meaningful and true.
I lost my beautiful daughter Elizabeth aged 31yrs in April 2025. I found her on her bedroom floor in her flat , i did Cpr until ambulance came but she’d passed away from SUDEP. My whole world fell apart . I will never be the same person again. Im just existing now until im with her again.
Im asking people to sign my petition for more information about SUDEP. Please can you sign.
@Sharon1993 Sharon1993hi Sharon yes I will definitely sign it..
Gosh that must of been so traumatic as a mother to go through such an experience.Only you truly know just how traumatic that experience was and it’s something like that will most definitely change you as a person forever.
Firstly I’mtouched that you showed your counselor my poem…then secondly that she thought it was meaningful and true.
I might also go for some bereavement counselling myself as even though we’re all grieving (my family that is)…There’s that sense of personal isolation as the pain is personal to me and not having someone to talk to at times does make my ability to processes the inner turmoil ect makes it harder.
It’s great that you’re seeing one and as the weeks and months roll on I sincerely hope you have a greater stamia to cope with the many valleys that are part of the journey ahead.
I did another poem on here a few days ago dedicated to the fact that dealing with grief is a moment by moment experience that helps us somehow get through each day.
It might help in some tiny way regarding an emphatic perspective on how it feels to have to endure the constant daily struggle with grief.
. I will never be the same person again. Im just existing now until im with her again.