Does anyone have any tips on how to cope with these huge waves of emotions that just seem to hit so hard?
Things seem ‘ok’, and I can get on with my day, but then out of nowhere I physically hurt, feel sad and just cry. It’s like the reality of it all hits home.
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@catqueen i wish I had some tips for you and me, I can be fine one moment and in floods of tears the next. I was walking the dogs this morning and ended up in tears halfway round ended up hurrying home hoping I wouldn’t meet anyone. I am just over 7 weeks into this awful journey we are on.
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i dont think there is any answers to this or how to deal with this im numb its only be a week partner pasted monday and granddaughter born the next day i wish there was answers
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I would advise that if you can, give those emotions the space they need - they’re coming to the surface because they need to be expressed. I think it comes in waves because if it came all at once the enormity of it would just destroy us. Depending where you are, if a wave of grief comes then just let it out - its healthy to release it if you can. If you need to sob, scream, wail - do it (i scream into a pillow just so as not to frighten the neighbours too much!) I know in the very early weeks i found it excruciating, but ive read that the only way to get through the pain is to get through the pain - theres no avoiding it.
Of course sometimes it might not be an appropriate time/place and you can try distraction techniques to diffuse the emotions for a while. But eventually they’ll want to come out! Over time hopefully you will find the gap between those big waves gets a fraction longer. Its been 10 months for me and those huge waves are less frequent, but i still actively make time each day to reflect and grieve and let my emotions out - i really notice it when i dont. Sending hugs and strength 
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Thank you all so much for your replies. My best friends son passed away a few weeks ago and his funeral was yesterday. We have spent so much time preparing for it and now it’s over and there is nothing to do. It’s so hard to grasp that I won’t see his smile face or hear his giggle again. I hurt so much for his family too.
I will try my best to ride with it. I am so sorry to read that others are also going through this and I send my love and hugs. Thank you all for stopping by and for taking the time to reply. I will remember you all when a wave hits xx
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Hi
Wish I knew. Today not very good. Am trying but looking around no energy did have a lovely.message from retired man. But have somehow drifted back to getting upset.and calling out her name. I cannot go back wards as have work in 5 days. Dreading it same old chit chat. As though nothing has changed. Only me and jack now was 4 of us. When we go out i try to go where we use to walk thats juat so so painful. Am told there are good days but maybe its coz it was only june my life changed for ever. Must try to get out whilat weather is ok. But sorry dirfted there these days will remain but we have to try and manage but thought i knew but I dont. Juat keep talking to friends mine are ok but sone have drifted as abit fed up of me. But thing is maybe if I do find something else to fill on my time.I may have other things to talk about to them. X
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I am so sorry to hear you are also struggling. I guess with reminders everywhere it can not be escaped. I feel like I can’t be here with everyone else mentally because of where my head is and how quickly I get upset. I am also sorry you have lost friends. All I can assume is that they really don’t understand. I never understood until experiencing it.
I quite like to do jigsaw puzzles - I find that these help me to think about what is in front of me for a change. I think sometimes that is the best we can do and accept that. Something truly awful has happened x
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im sorry for everyone who is going through is im just waiting for that text book but cousre there isnt i get angry then i get upset and we havent even laid him to rest i still feel like im going to wake up from this nightmare but i no deep down im never going to get out of it
sorry for everyone c
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Tracydick
Dont apologise we know what your going through. I didnt use this site till afterwards as I didnt know it was here. I hope you find some peace here.
Do try and look after yourself. Its a long road of grief but make sure you have decent people around you. My partner past in June feels like a few minutes ago. Alot of emotions you are and will continue to have. One day at a time x
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Im the same i feel for you . Its been 7months for me and one minute you think your ok then woosh its like a wave coming over you and ivend up crying i cant help it . I feel so lost without my soul mate. I have my sister she is a big help to me.
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Hi Duk
Today I spoke with 2 people one in the co op he did not know he was shocked. I broke down he told me he hqd a lung disease I didnt know… I went to the park met another one of our friends she has stage 3 cancer I knew she had cancer. So in reality when they say 1 in 2 they mean just about everyone. I am so upset still 3 months on 19th. And for you 7 months. It doesnt seem real still and never will. X
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Thank you very much im giving you big hugs❤️
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It’s been nearly one year since my wife died, it hasn’t really got any easier. But the only advice I can give is don’t beat yourself up for emotions, it’s the only natural thing to do, and you’re clearly not alone in this. Just know the person you love is worth every tear
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