The way i deal with grief

I lost my right hand the love of my life 6 months ago the best i do at dealing with ut is i light a tea light candle with her picture every day i go on walks with our dog and kids every day do things with family that would if made her happy if she was here even though it hurts at times but also makes me smile i go to her grave with flowers and sit and talk to her also i have her ashes in a necklace but my job is to fight it but also keep her in my heart always and forever will remember her grief is hard no doubt for 4 months i was lost in my head but my kids kicked my arse and i do cry every night but i also smile everytime i see her picture un my phone and just try keep it together and think she would not want me to sad all the time but every night i cry and pray for her and say i love her always and forever we all can do this i am still finding it hard always will she was my right hand lover her always and forever in my heart


Hi Maxine081122,

Thank you so much for sharing this with the community :blue_heart: I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.

Take good care,

1 Like

Hi @Maxine081122 . Your story is extremely typical of our journeys through grief, it is certainly very reminiscent of mine!
The path might not be clear to you yet, but as you plod on, the happy memories and smiles will blank out the tears, and the new chapter of your life will take shape.
Im sat here talking to Penny through her picture, who died 13 months ago, and I am smiling.
Plod on, you’ll get there.

1 Like

Hi again @Maxine081122 . Soon after Penny died, and I finally accepted my life would have to change, a lovely friend asked me how I would like my new life to be. So I wrote a life plan for me.
It had big and little things in it, such as:

Everything I did would consider the welfare of her two dogs
I would continue to live in the house we shared for 50 years.
I would make her garden much easier for me to care for.
I would make positive attempts to care for my friendships, and make real efforts to get out there and make new friends. I wouldnt wait for them to walk through the door.
If I was out and about shopping or walking, I would always try to stop and have a drink and a bun, preferably outside where the dogs are fantastic at getting conversations started. I always look to see if someone else was sitting alone and asked if I could join them, and we chat away and friendships form. (More later on this !)
I’ll live more simply and frugally.
I’ll buy a cheap reliable car.

It didnt happen overnight, but its helped me to get restarted on my next life chapter.

I promised more on forming friendships! When I’m out and about, one of my dogs (a little poochon) seems to have decided I need a new wife. I don’t. But she doesnt understand. If she sees who she thinks might be a suitable candidate, ie any lady on her own, she goes over and gets a pat, puts her paw on her knee and stares into their eyes. She always turns to look at me, and Im sure she is saying “how about this one Dad?”.
Everyone needs a dog!