Hi. My name is Ian. 54. NHS frontline worker for Cornwall 111 out of hours. I lost my 2 four year old sons many years ago. I never had counselling or spoke to anyone. My wife of 26 years and I seperated. I fell deeply in love with my new wife 11 years ago . Due to my drinking and my neglect to this perfect lady and her our children I was asked to leave the family home. This post is hopefully my 1st step to talk and learn to live with my mistakes. Hopefully then win back my best friend my wife. Never give up. You are all stronger than you can ever imagine x
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Thank you Ian for your uplifting words. I’m glad you’ve found this forum. It’s a place where people understand how tough and raw it can be. Take care.
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Dear Ian,
Thank you for so honestly sharing your situation. You took a brave step by coming to this site, looking for help to deal with your loss and find your way back to the ones you love.
You may find it helpful to read this article, written by a parent about grieving the loss of her child:
Jo
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Thank for your kind words. As we all know the pain never goes away we just learn to cope in other ways. (Don’t ever feel guilty for smiling again)
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Very true words. I have almost stopped the drinking now altogether as I could see myself never winning my life back. Truth and openness is my goal now. Giving my wife the space she needs has given me a chance to seek help in my loss of my children and grieve as I should have done a few years ago.
Dear Ian, I too am an NHS worker. Life can be so hard and losing children is the hardest thing that we will ever go through. You have been so brave in taking these steps and recognising what has been going wrong. I really hope that you get a second chance with your wife … you certainly deserve one. Let us know how you get on.
xxx
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Ian, I echo every word which has been said to you.
Take care and stay safe,
MaryL
Thank you all for all your kind words. Loosing my sons was horrific. Have tried councillors but it not for.me. Am a private person who thought I could cope on my own. How wrong was i. However i can share my feelings here it seems a safe and friendly place. Ian.c x
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