I just looked through my Cruise bereavement book and after you done all the important stuff, then the book is chucklable. I did have couple numbers one not in use no more and the cruse number has been suspended. I managed to be in touch with a kind caring person on FB, but after the important stuff is done. We are hung out to defend for ourselves. I’m no wiser and couldn’t afford a counselor.
Does anyone else feels like this ?
Hi Keith
If youre looking for emotional support, there are some free counselling services provided by Sue Ryder, also if you are in the UK you can self refer via the NHS talking therapies service. If there is a hospice in your local area they sonetimes provide counselling or bereavement support groups (not just for hospice patients) so its worth giving them a call or checking their website. However most of these come with a waiting list and thats where there can be a big gap from the point of bereavement to getting support. Thats where this site has proved invaluable for me!
It might be worth checking whether churches in your area offer any drop in groups for bereaved individuals - Usually you can just turn up, no waiting list.
There is also a site “At a loss” which signposts to bereavement services by geographical area so if you havent tried that it might be worth a look? https://www.ataloss.org/Pages/FAQs/Category/organisations-that-can-help?Take=24
Hope some of this might help! 
The other thing i found some comfort in during the early weeks was podcasts - there are a lot of podcasts out there related to grief. I used to listen when i went for my daily walk. There are ones offering advice and others like Griefcast invites celebrities to share their grief stories, which i found helped me feel less alone