Thank you so much for your understanding and taking the time to respond. Their Dad was such a kind and generous man. I just hate seeing him reduced to no more than a balance sheet.
Hi martin 64, u hav made me laugh, where theres a will, theres a relative. If your wife made a will that stands in a court of law, what ever she left 2 the people she wanted 2 get her house etc. No one can change that. As i learnt.
If theres is a will check with the law people.
I meant the will people
Thank you Martin for your time and wise words in your response. I also have three sons and had my husband been left I am confident they would not have reacted in the same cruel and greedy way.
Take good care of yourself. Itās a very bumpy path we are all on.
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good evening everybody,its been very busy chat time,which is good,because we can! im off to family by train tomorrow(cornwall to bristol)when i return on monday i shall be quick turn around and go to our happy place down on the coast,i can drive myself there,a friend,also on her own is happy to share her house with me ,its one place that doesnt make me sad.we had th e the very best 11 years of retirement there,i feel totally relaxed,maybe its the sea air and the kindness of some very special people who have become firm friends,iam blessed. i shall be there a few days,then i feel i ok going back again in a few weeks,dont want to over stay my welcome. it will be 48th wedding anniversary when im there,so i shall have company in beautiful surroundings,not sitting at home brooding alone. as i said consider myself quite blessed. cheers all. catch up soon. ā¦ohh having read some stories about dealing with various companies. i emailed the caravan insurance company last year asking them to change policy to my name.i never heard back,when policy was due for re-newal last week i recieved a letter address to my husband,so i had to phone them,getting through security questions a minefield as i realised it was his DOB "security question"they required,it took some time to speak to a human,they didnt know i had mailed them,i didnt renew the insurence as i had just sold the van,there was no response to my info that my husnabd had died. today he got a letter from them,ok,generic āHi Adrianā blah blah,sorry you are not re-insuring with us. how ignorant. blood boils! on that note i will say again,catch up soon,look after yourselves.
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@PaulineM1 hi pauline itās my will not Lindaās she never made one what a noghtmare that was bit we didnāt expect it to me linda ot should been me bit we took the life insurance out on is both as Linda was younger it wasnāt much more Iām glad we did but i just wanted linda to be safe and not have to worry if i went she had enough grief in her life before us to last a lifetime but never expected her untimely death at 53 as i said maybe it was her final gift and thing she could do for me in a way but good god it hurts i really do wish i could give it back in exchange for her back if only that was possible im glad i made you laugh its a saying my dad always said so stuck with me all these years but never a more true word said in jest as they say lol its nice to make someone laugh at least once a day of you can laughter best form of medicine and im truly sorry you lost your hubby thank you for the message take care of you
Martin 
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@Beryl1B your welcome Beryl i hope it goes as well as it can and as least stress as possible
You take really good care of you too it is a really bumpy ride we are on mind you with the state of the roads now i guess should be used to it but no look after you if you need a chat or a vent give me a shout on here
Martin
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So Martin is yr will all tied up. & grief is hell
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Martin so sorry for yr lose Linda only 53. 
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Nightwish1
I am sorry i didnt explain myself very well.The ex work colleagues i went with on saturday were from my workplace.My wife only has a sister who is disabled and had a brain hemmorage her mental state is not good,also a cousin.Initially after my dear wife had passed people rang now hardly anything.I rang bereavement support this morning and they said they would ring back this afternoon,nothing.Like your Sue my wife was my everthing.I loved her with all my heart now there is just emptyness,lonelliness and no real future.4 months in and its still so hard.
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@PaulineM1 my will is done but was done when linda was still here so its going to need modifiying now as she was executor and now things have changed and passed it needs doing again more expense i guess that seems the only people to gain in this life is funeral directors and solicitors pauline 
yes way to young really she was ten years younger than me but we always thought age is just a number its the person and how they make you feel that counts we believed
Martin
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i saw this and thought i think this is me today,ready to get the train,spend time with family,have some fun
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No need to apologise. We are all on a crap path. Itās hard because everyone else moves on as they should, but we still love are partners and canāt see a future without them. I hope you have a better day, take care.
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@manb
Morningā¦That is so trueā¦
Itās 15 weeks today since I lost John suddenly but I have begun to feel less unhappy or sad and I can control the tears.
Some days I donāt have any tears but he is constantly in my thoughts and always will be. I love him as much now as I did when he was with me.
Now I can think of him and smile. I didnāt think I ever would as it was so so bad at the beginning of this awful journey.
Thank you for posting I think it will help some people on hereā¦
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@Mitzi1
The sun is shiningā¦ but the outlook couldnāt be more bleak for me. I feel so very sad, numb and empty. I canāt believe that the āsunshineā of my life is no longer here, and never will be. I have to register my darlingās death today and collect the death certificatesā¦ (somehow)ā¦ this is something that I need to do. To make things worse, itās also my beloved dadās birthday today who I also lost to cancer. I never thought for a single second, that I would find myself in this situation at the age of 58. I miss him so muchā¦ just him being here, made everything ok. We had so many dreams and plans, and now heās gone. Life is so cruel and unfair. I just donāt know what to do. Iām broken 
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Hi heartofgold,
Today is not nice,but i hope you will have someone with you. I was lucky one of Sueās shop volunteers came with me. The funeral i had to do on my own. Take care,just one step at a time on this crap path.
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Thank you Nightwish1.I hope you have a good as day as you can.Take care.
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I always say just because I carry it well doesnāt means itās not heavy
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Very true, takes a while & many false starts where you think itās under control but then youāll get a day that takes you by surprise & you feel back where you were. Iām 5 years on & still get those days now. Usually after being out & having family time I get a period where Iām sad that Derek wasnāt there to enjoy it, especially seeing our grandchildren grow who he never met. Those feelings never go away, you just live with them better & you need to strive to do this however it hurts, otherwise you never move forward. Take care 
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Sadly I echo every word. Registration, certificates, arranging funerals I just did, almost on autpilot, because they had to be done.
One task,one step at a time.
As for everything else, itās different. Pointless. Donāt know why I bother breathing - happily wouldnāt. Doesnāt help to have our wedding anniversary coming up fast.
We carry on because weāre expected to I guess.
Sunshine? Iām with Bill Withers on that one.
Take care and good luck.
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