Happiness
Happiness was the laughter of M that filled every room. As though it was contagious, her laugh radiated.
Happiness was going to the beach, the sand between my toes and the ocean at my feet.
Happiness was all the little things, the kisses, the hugs and always feeling loved. Happiness now seems just like a memory, with everyday each one drifting further away.
Instead in its place is grief, a feeling which never quite goes away. But creeps up until every inch of happiness is no more. Thinking back of the ‘happy times’ now feels so sad, wishing everyday to keep the happy memories I once had.
Now all I can see, is the bad memories that now haunt me. Each day begging her to stay, not knowing that there would come a day. A day where I could no longer feel ur hugs, or ever feel loved.
Watching M take her last breath will always stay, repeating and reminding me that life is this way. Each day getting harder to stay with these happy times just being too far away.
Hoping that someday I’ll feel the sand between my toes and not feel so low. Or be able to let people in, not fearing that they’ll leave. So my hope is this today, that happiness won’t always be far away, but rather close and will choose to stay.
Love,
S
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Love your poetry
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