Time heals is rubbish

The phrase time heals all wounds is the biggest load of bull I’ve ever heard! I lost my dad suddenly in march to a short battle with cancer. It is never going to heal there is going to be a dad shaped hole in my heart for the rest of my life. I can’t sing along to songs in the car anymore I just cry after the first line, I can’t go to his as the hole just fells as though it gets bigger and bigger and I can’t talk to anyone cause all I do is cry and can’t talk about it through the tears.

I just don’t see an end to all the tears am I ever going to be able to talk about him or think about him without crying. I can’t even stop the tears as I write this.

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I too don’t think time heals… All the passing of time does is make you get better at hideing how you’re feeling.

My sister died in April this year short battle with cancer a massive shock. I cried every day for weeks on end. Then I cried part of every day. Now I she’d a tear every other day. The pain and hurt is still as raw I’m just more practised at hideing it.


It’s over twenty years, since I lost my Dad. (My mum died a year ago and it’s raw.)
At times, over the years, I’ve forgotten the aniversary of my Dad’s passing. I’d sometimes notice the day had passed by a couple of days. I was busy living and enjoying life. I do believe it gets better over time, but that it could take a very long time.
However, our loved ones are forever missed. We learn to live with it.

Dear @Kitty88kat, I am so sorry you lost your wonderful dad. You loved him so much, like I loved my dad, and the loss is so difficult. You’re correct, it is indeed BS, time might make us think of them less, but it will never heal, never in my life will there be a day where my heart won’t ache to be with my dad.

I hope you’re coping ok.


I am a year along today and can safely say time is no healer. Whilst we do get on with life I miss dad every day. Forever is a long time. I cope by trying to think what he would say to me. I also have my faith so believe he is in heaven watching down on us. The pain felt today on the 1 year anniversary is worse than what I felt when he died.

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Hi hannah
I so agree with you. It’s now 16 months since my mum died very suddenly and unexpectedly and the pain gets worse and worse.
I think its because they feel so far away from us now and the reality that we will never see them again sinks in more and more as time goes on.
When mum first died I was in awful shock but i had only seen her the day before and she still felt so real.
I dont expect to feel better for many years to come and I have accepted this pain and grief as part of my every day life.

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My passed away 5 years ago and I agree with you time does not heal… I feel the same emotions I did the day she died, I try to hide it better but inside I’m definitely broken

It depends on how you view it . I believe time does heal . The raw pain and shock does lessen over time and when the point of acceptance has been reached. The fact you have lost someone you love never goes away and there will always be a void in our lives and heartbreak, however, over time we focus on the love, not the pain. We treasure the memories and count the blessings. We learn to laugh a little, we learn to smile, we learn to adapt. The time in which that takes is individual

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Hi LynT
I agree with you wholeheartedly. I still have tears like everyone else and why shouldn’t we. We loved special people, it’s only fair that we should remember them, I don’t want to forget, ever. I sometimes feel empty and don’t think I will ever be the same again but I am beginning to treasure the memories and be thankful for the time we had together as well as every day that gives me some small enjoyment. I am managing to live alone and keep myself occupied. Like you Lyn I am learning to smile and even laugh, yes, we don’t always like our new life but we do adapt, what other option do we have.