Tips for visiting someone in a hospice

Visiting a loved one in a hospice can be scary and upsetting. You might be worried about breaking down in front of them, or finding it hard to know what to say.

But your visit can also be very special, and a chance to share some quality time together.

You might wonder:
• How can you prepare yourself?
• What could you bring for them?
• What should you say to them?
• How long should you stay?

What do you think? What tips would you give to someone visiting a loved one in a hospice?

Be yourself; Act normal (no tears!); Mainly depends on what stage the person is at:

John loved doing crosswords; my son brought a newspaper everyday and read out the clues and John would join in giving us the answer.
Also took a Jack Daniels and crystal glasses so they could both have a proper drink.
My sister made a chocolate mouse and Jelly as it was easier to swallow.
General chit chat with some humour thrown in.
Don’t stay too long as they tend to get tired easily and the attention span is short.
Hope this helps

Thank you very much for sharing - those are all really helpful ideas.

It sounds as though John was surrounded by caring people who were very thoughtful when they visited.

Hi there

I’d say it’s a terribly scary time and so terribly sad.

I remember when the consultants told us there was nothing more they could do for my Mum.

The next stage was to move her to a hospice I remember holding my breath waiting for a space at a hospice thinking oh no Mums going to die now.

I’d say visiting them is so important being near them being ur self just talk like u did before. I found it very very hard. My Mums food had to be taken away one of her conditions for moving to the hospice because she couldn’t digest her food so she couldn’t eat anything and I remember her being so weak she didn’t want to talk back to me she just wanted me to sit with her and hold her hand.

I remember how sad she was when people didn’t visit.

Every Saturday as weak as she was she would get ready to see her family but no one would come.

So I’d say please visit even though its hard
Think how hard it is for them.

They r dying they need us more

Big hugs to you all xxxx

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