Lost my Mum three weeks ago. Nobody around me has been through the loss of one parent before, let alone the loss of both. Nobody knows what to say or how to treat me. Any tips on how to politely answer “are you OK?” or “how are you doing?”, I know they are trying to support me but I want to scream at them everytime
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I was just thinking this to myself yesterday. Sorry I don’t have an answer for you. I lost my ex partner who was still very much the love of my life this week and I just want to scream like you when people ask this. I know they’re being kind. But I’m broken. And I’m really not ok.
But like you say how do you answer this question.
Hugs to you through this dreadful time.
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Its a horrible question, even 2 years into grief because its just so huge - how do you capture the myriad of emotions into one compact response?! My go to response is “im taking it one day at a time”. You’ll get to know the people who are satisfied with just a brief answer and those genuinely care and REALLY want to know how you’re doing, that you can open up to. 
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@Ally6
That’s pretty much my response at the moment. My sister in law is great though, she can tell by the tone of my answer whether I’m telling the truth or giving the answer I think she wants to hear.
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Yes I find people do not want to hear all truth when they say how are you doing.
I hust say something like I am still plodding on but whatever I say no one likes to hear too much. Nkr do I want to reply.
Or they say you are doing well if you force yourself to endure some things. I prefer sometimes being where no one knows you. I find it easier doing an activity like clay modelling which is therapeutic but still struggle there. Just have to push through all the experiences somehow. I
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