Hiya guys thought 
I’d share my story I’m 38 with 3 kids 18 16 15 I lost my partner my soul mate 8 weeks ago at Marie curie she died in my arms she was 37 we was together 18 years I feel like I can’t breath I can’t sleep I can’t work eat I can drink that’s the only thing I can do but not to excess I’m struggling with the fact I have to live maybe 40 years with out her I’m angry I did not die her family have all but abandoned me and my children and it’s a big family my kids are doing fundraising for Marie curie so are other members of the family there all happy most days they all go home to somebody and me I’m alone I’m empty and I feel like I did die that day 2. She was the only person that truly got me my humour my everything she new me inside out and I’m alone people say go to clubs support groups but I can’t cos if I felt sad angry upset alone I went to her. I can’t see a way out please tell me I’m not alone as Iv never felt so alone in my hole life my dad died 2 years ago my mum has breast cancer so I don’t want to bother them with this plus they all act like it’s just another day
Hi Stuart.
You are definitely not alone my wife passed back in April and I have been through(and still are to some degree)what you are going through,when I said why wasn’t it me a wise women said to me,would you want your wife to go through what you’re going through now.
The people on this forum are nice,I have even found a bit of humour in the last couple of weeks,sadly I can’t offer you advice only one step at a time.
Regards Ron.
No, you are not alone. My husband died on 25th May. It was a cardiac arrest, so not expected and a huge shock. All I can say is the usual stuff, take it an hour at a time. Eat if you can, even if what you eat is rubbish, it’s better than nothing.
Don’t think about the future, just get through every hour until the day is done.
You will start to have better days, when the waves are smaller and further apart.
Xx
Yes that is how it is. Getting used to it .
Seems you never will but you gradually do. Doesn’t seem like it at times.
I am so very sorry for your loss. This group does help. I wouldn’t have made any sense of my grief without it.
Hi @Stuartt I’m so sorry for your loss and for you feeling so alone and abandoned. It truly is a horrible time and so hard with the kids, who will be needing their dad at this time. When my husband died both mine and his families were just absent and really unsupportive. If they did get in contact they wouldn’t want to hear if we were struggling and would say things like “ we will be here when you are ready”. Ready for what I still don’t know - although as my sisters in law recently invited me on a girls weekend away I presume they mean ready for when you are back to normal. No matter I have kids at home and can’t just leave them on their own.
It’s hard when the people you think will be there for you let you down, but you need to try and keep going for your children. Lean on those who are around for you and it does get easier to manage but you do need to make sure you are looking after yourself - eating drinking and getting some rest. I know it all seems pointless at the moment but your partner would want you to keep trying and to eventually start living again in time.
Just one day at a time is all we can do.
Sending some love and strength xxx
Hiya Stuart
I am sorry you are part of the group nobody wants to be part of.
I lost my husband in june and I know how hard this journey is.
Its exhausting lonely sad and an all lot more.but some how some way we get from one day to the next.
The tears fall when you least expect them . You physically ache.
Just try and take each day as it comes fotget people who dont care. And cling on to those who do. Hugs Jo xxx
So sorry you find yourself here, Stuart; somewhere none of us want to be. It’s so hard. Just take an hour at a time and try to rest if you can.
Sorry that you have joined the club that no one wants to be in. I lost my husband (61) suddenly at the end of a June. Fine one minute, gone the next. I have spent most of the last three months trying to process my loss. I am told I am coping well but I think my brain believes he will walk back on the door! I am very lucky to have children and grandchildren who live nearby and we are a very close family, but as I’m disabled things have got much more challenging for me. I try to plan things to do (like a massage, have my hair done, find a good book to read) and take each day as it comes. I have managed to establish a new routine, which still involves school pick ups and the volunteering I did before he died. I have days when I feel ok, others when anything will set me off crying. We all grieve very differently, but I have found help reading some of the posts on here and seeing those further along the journey than I am have helped me to see what the future may look like. 2 months ago, maybe even a month ago I wouldn’t have seen that. Sending a hug for your family x
I’m sorry for your loss @Stuartt. I lost my husband last week suddenly. We are in our early 40’s and our kids are both under 10. The thought of having to bring the boys up on my own is very overwhelming. Thank you for posting your story, it’s a comfort to know there are more like me out there.
So sorry for your loss Stuartt
We all totally understand……although grief is personal to you, everyone goes through similar feelings…
We are all here for each other in this forum…you can come and vent or be sad….we all know exactly how you feel……we feel it too…
Sending you love and support
Lisa
macy03
Very early days for you….so, so sorry for your loss.
I lost my partner on the 20 August this year……
Everyone on this forum is here to support each other….we all totally understand what you’re going through….
Sending love and a huge hug
lisa
Thank you @Macy03 its awful early on when my wife died it’s easier all the stuff you have to do funerals banks it’s just easy as your none stop but the more time passes the harder it gets watching people move on so quickly. This group does help tho it’s only you guys that understand me
You are not alone, all of us here know how you feel and how difficult it is for you and your children. I am so sorry! In those first awful days and weeks, I felt exactly the same as you and only my kids kept me going. But I knew I had to just put one foot in front of the other for their sakes even if I didn’t care about me anymore. I felt I was robbed of my life and my future with my soul mate.
Please find support, counselling maybe and try to take care of yourself. Very slowly you will find the strength to take it hour by hour, day by day. 2 of my 3 kids got counselling, the other never wanted it and I worry that it’s just going to hit him hard a some point in the future.
It is hardest thing I’ve ever had to do to make a different life for the children and myself. Take care