Today was a bad day

It’s almost three weeks since my wonderful hubby died. His funeral isn’t until the 7th Dec. I intended to take his suit (the one he got married in) to the funeral directors. I thought I could handle it. Big mistake. One look at all his shirts hanging up just broke me. I couldn’t stop crying and calling his name. I miss him so much. It hurts so much. I feel so lost and alone. My daughter and her family live three hours away. I feel so vulnerable and scared. Tony was always there for me. We were inseparable. How does anyone carry on liviing with this pain inside them. I feel ripped apart. I can’t believe I will never see him again. Never hold his hand or have a hug. My life is empty. Nothing has any meaning for me. I’m hardly eating. I just sit in front of the TV in a fog.

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I am so sorry for your loss do you have any good friends that could maybe stay with you just now?

No not really. My daughter and her family came down for the weekend but had to go back home yesterday. My mum is almost blind and in a wheelchair and my dad and step mum are on holiday. My sister in law is coming with me tomorrow to take his clothes to the funeral directors. I’ve always been a private person, no real close friends. My life pretty much revolved around my husband.

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I’m so sorry your going through this lost my husband 1year ago and the pain is terrible but I’m 1year on and I cry every day but not as bad as I was at the beginning I was married 44years to the love of my life you take care of yourself lv annie x

Dear Joules58

I am so sorry for your loss and you are having a bad day. Could your family or friends take yours husbands suit to the funeral directors for you instead. You carry on living for the love of your daughter and family and by taking 1 step at a time each day and looking after yourself.

Have you thought about talking to your daughter, friends and neighbours as to how you are feeling. Cruse Bereavement have a helpline available for chatting to how you feel (UK residents only) 0808 808 1677 and an online chat Bereavement Counsellor is available. All free.

Sue Ryder offer a Counselling Service also. Have you looked at the topic on here on Losing a partner to connect with other members of the community. You are not alone in this .

Everything you are going through is normal and part of the grieving process. Your life has been turned upside down and it is perfectly normal to feel the way you do. It has only been 3 weeks since the loss of your husband so things are still very raw.

We are here to support you always. Take care. xx

I know exactly what you mean, Jim and I lived for one another but our children are all within 20 miles so I have had some lovely support……I hope all goes well at his funeral :two_hearts:

It’s been 8 months since my world fell apart when my one and only true love of 28 years died at only 49. Since then I have heard all the usual clichés ‘one day at a time’ ’ time is a great healer’ etc etc . However, the one that stuck in my mind was ‘Its ok not to be ok’ . I am very similar tou in that Gail was my life and don’t have many people to talk to but sharing on here does help in a little way to help understand that you are not alone.

Take care
Damien
x

Thank you Damien
Yes some comments are so shallow and mostly from people who haven’t lost someone so dear to them.
It’s OK not to be OK sounds good to me. Also someone else on here wrote, if I MUST live my life without my husband it has to be a LIFE . I think my husband would agree with that too.
Today I took his clothes to the funeral directors accompanied by my sister in law and when I got home I did two hours of weeding. My garden is nothing special but Tony used to love buying me different plants for the garden, (not that they all flourished) but it helped lift my spirits.
Yes I agree, this site is very helpful in knowing we’re not alone and we know and can share the terrible pain of losing someone we loved so deeply.
Take care.
Julie

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I too lost my husband recently , 10th November. I have had lots of support and the funeral on Tuesday was a very positive event. However today I am finally on my own and it all hurts so much. I am crying, drinking, I feel panicky and I just can’t accept that he will never be back. I am angry. Angry at the cancer and angry that he got cancer and died leaving me alone.

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