My Lovely wife passed away 5 years ago, and I am still no over it. I still miss her so much. Almost every day I shed tears. She was my special one, I thought I would go long before her, as I was older. but cancer does not discriminate. The hurt is still there. The emptiness does not go away, when you return home, to an empty house, no one to say " hello darling" or to give you that welcoming kiss. no cuddle when you feel down. or comforting words. You go through the motions each day, but sometimes wonder what for. Even with all your family and friends you feel so alone. each night go to bed alone, no one to cuddle up to. Each day you wake up to an empty pillow beside you.
Then I start to wonder did I do enough for her, Could I have some of her pain. Did I say the right the right things, and listen enough. Did she know how much I really loved her. All of the beautiful things we saw and did together, now gone, They do not mean a thing without her beside me. That special someone that gave it that beauty. This should have been our 60th wedding anniversary, we had such plans for this year, Those precious moments, lost forever. they say time will heal, things will get better. They do not. The children have lives of their own, and their own children. they do all they can to help. At 85 I am reasonably healthy, but without my darling Jan I struggle to find the enthusiasm. I know there are many worse off than me, but that is no comfort.
Death may take you from me, and keep us far apart,
But death will not erase your love, or memory from my heart.


Hello Tony,my husband passed away only 9 weeks ago,we were married 51yrs the grief is so painful,I can imagination in 5 years time saying the things you have said,I know I will never get over the loss of my husband it has left me heartbroken my life feels over never been on my own before

Look after yourself

Christine x

Thank you Christine.

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Ditto, you’ve written exactly how I feel.

My husband passed away in August and I feel like I will never get over this I’m only 59 and to think I will feel like this for maybe 20 years or more is more than I can stand my life was over the day he was taken from me I have no family left and friends have stayed away since funeral can I stand this life for years to come ?


I think for the first year I was feeling quite numb.

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Hi Misprint, so sorry for your loss. I am lucky that it has happened later in my life.
I have family and Jans family , also friends and good neighbours who have been there for me. Also many of Jans friends have kept in touch. But I still feel the loneliness.

Hi Misprint, I feel exactly the same. I am 59 and lost my wife of 38 years in February and I am just full of dread that I may have to bear this loss for 20years, it devastates me, the loneliness is already unbearable, my friends have also stayed away, this morning is 1st December, my wife would always surprise me with an Advent calendar with chocolates in it, no calendar today just an empty fireplace. my life cant pass by quick enough! take care.


Hi tonyo42, my lovely wife would have been 78 today (the 1st). She was still the beautiful girl I married 60 years ago, at 17.


You have expressed my feelings about the loss of my partner exactly! I lost him in May and it really is no easier now than it was then. I do keep trying though because I know that is what he wanted.