Hi everyone
I’ve posted a few times on here and PM’d a couple of you. You all seem very supportive of each other and it has been helpful to know I’m not alone in what I’m going through. However, today has been a really tough day. Don’t really know why today seems tougher. All I know is I really really can’t live each day without my husband. We were so happy. He was my everything. His family don’t even reach out to me. He told me every day how much he loved me and how I made him happier than he’s ever been. And he made me so happy and feel so loved. I can’t get out of my head that if I did one little thing differently he’d still be here. There is no way I can live without him. I’m in hell and I want out now. Xxx

It is so hard in the early months. My husband was only 50 - went out for a run and collapsed. I know what it is like to feel as you describe. You need to take it just a breath at a time some days. Take any support that you can. Have you tried counselling or spoken to your GP? Do you have people you can call and talk to when it all seems too much? Please keep plodding on and messaging / posting when you can. I am 6 months in now and it does become different to the early months. Life will never be the same again but reaching out to others will keep you going. Feel free to PM is you want to.