What triggers you off? I was only coming back from the supermarket and got triggered off by all the nice daffodils thinking how sad he can’t see them as he said he wouldn’t be here to do so before he went into hospital in Oct and died five weeks later


@enorac Music, but I refuse to skip the track and try and work through it. Film dialogue, talking to friends about shared memories - pretty much anything depending on my mood. This grief is like trying to ride a drunken donkey - one minute you’re going sedately in a straight line feeling reasonably in control and the next minute it’s turned off the path, accelerated and you’re desperately trying to stay seated whilst it crashes through the trees and bushes.


Morning Enorac
One of my triggers is the siren going off on a fire engine when I’m out as Pete was a fireman for many years and was brilliant at his job. He was a very kind and caring man and should still be with me.
To Just some bloke
You made me smile with your donkey story… Yes trying to stay seated while crashing through the trees and bushes sums the whole relentless grieving process up so well.
Thoughts to you both this sunny Easter and to everyone on this caring site.
Love Jenny xx


Jenny I knew a fireman years ago who used to make me laugh. My kids would sing a song that went I am fireman Phil Im the fireman I am I am fireman Phil I go up the ladder and I get the poor man out etc to tube of postman pat. We had a baby sitting circle and his wife was a nurse on nights so while she was sleeping he was mum and childminder too while he was off duty. If he got a call she had to wake up and take over. He was a lovely man too. D
My husband used to help people when he was at work. That is why I married him as he helped me. Now that is hugest loss his trying to help. But I wish could have helped him but hope he is in a nice place not just nowhere as he had faith.