Sorry, it can be very difficult, as people expect you to be ok after a while, but inside you’re not. It is useful to draw strength from people on here who understand, but real life groups are good too. Not necessarily counselling but also volunteering groups. Do you have any friends or family you could tell how sad you are feeling? Sending all good wishes.
Floss1 I used to cook for my mum too and she cooked for me. She was a veggie very before her time for over 40 years and was decorating weeks before her stroke she was a fit 82 so this was a shock how quickly in a year she got so frail. I think until you start to accept the loss this is a long process and missing their existence is so hard. I’m 57 and feel like an orphaned kid probably ridiculous to a lot who tell me to move on but your mums your mum eh? I’m sure every person lost knows how much we miss and love them.
Good luck for Friday I’m sure it will be a beautiful day and you will do her proud 
I will be thinking of you for the funeral send your lovely mum to rest. Please let me know how it goes xx
Please could I ask if your grief is causing insomnia x
@Floss1 ,
Hope all goes as well as it can today, if it’s anything like my mams funeral you won’t remember much about it by tonight :’(
I’ll be thinking about you
Jean x
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Thinking of you x
My heart goes out to you today. I’m sure it will all be beautiful and she will be proud of you 