I lost my grandad when he was nearing 94 (3 months off) on 29th October, 2022. I’m an immigrant, so from the age of 12 I had only seen him every couple of years. But the impact he had on me growing up has been huge and everyone had great things to say about him. He really was one of a kind.
I know it’s dumb to be so upset when someone that age dies, but I literally had a nervous breakdown and didn’t leave the house for over 6 months.
Last year’s anniversary didn’t feel like this at all. Yes it was sad, but this time I feel like I’m slipping back into that deep depression, just crying all the time, staring into space and having no motivation for existing, really.
Has anyone else experienced this? Why, all of a sudden, in the last few weeks I get hit with this overwhelming sadness? It will be two years tomorrow and I thought I’d be in a better place now, but it’s as if it happened yesterday. How long do these sadness waves last? This is my first actual experience of losing someone I really love and respect and I don’t know how I can carry on when my mum dies, for example.
I feel severely mentally impaired - is this what normal people feel constantly once they lose someone? It’s genuinely shocking and disturbing if this is “normal” and majority of people out there are dealing with these feelings.