Unexpected loss of mum

I had moved to China 3 months ago to start my teaching career. Mum was so supportive and had always been my biggest encouragement and inspiration. She was more like my best friend than my mum and we have been close for as long as I can remember, talking everyday no matter what. I’m only 23 and she was only 51. I was at a theme park in China when I got a phone call from my sister that mum was in hospital. I instantly burst out crying and knew it wasn’t good news; mum had always been healthy and was strong not to just get rushed to hospital. I later found out she had had a catastrophic brain haemorrage with no hope of recovering. Without even thinking my friends helped me pack my case and I was on the first flight home back to England. It’s been 3 weeks now since she’s passed and I am absolutely destroyed. I have no motivation to get out of bed on a morning and I can’t stand the thought of never seeing her face; hearing her voice or just hugging her again. She was one of a kind and had the most infectious laugh. You loved her from just meeting her. How do you cope with something like this? I’ve tried ringing for counseling but there is a long waiting list and I have to go back to China in january. People keep telling me that your life will never be the same again after losing your mum and that scares me. I don’t want my life to change. I just want my mum back.

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I am sorry for your loss Abz how sad for you. I lost my dear friend about 15 months ago and still cry every day-life will never be the same. Im not coping either people say it gets easier in time I dont find it is _ I am going backwards. What helps me a bit is talking to the photographs it gets things out of your system things you didnt get chance to say -I am full of guilt thinking if I hadnt done this or did this would this etc etc
I wish there was more help around for people like us -I just dont have much motivation
for anything now -hopefully your working in China will be a help I am retired so dont work and hope in time it will get easier for you

I lost my mum 3 months ago in very sudden circumstances. A horrific cardiac arrest in a stadium followed by her being resuscitated only to have a stroke and be pronounced brain dead a week later. I know how you feel about wanting your Mum back and not wanting to get out of bed. I’ve just managed to get bk to Work and it’s not easy; neither is the fact that my ‘best’ friend has decided I can no longer contact her. I’m in bits and trying to rebuild my life.

Hi Abz so sorry for your loss I have also lost my Mum who was my best friend and I honestly don’t know how to get through this .Its killing me to start sorting out her things so I’m going at it very slowly I don’t know about you but I feel totally numb and it hurts to think about her passing.Like your Mum mine was always laughing everyone loved her we were busy organising the funeral now it’s behind us I am broken I can’t think straight and just don’t want to throw her possessions away how are you coping and what are you doing to get through xmas ? I’m dreading it x

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