I hope the internment goes ok, and you and your friend have a good chat about your spouses.
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It looks as though we are all on the same journey, it’s been 2 and half years for me not a day goes by or even an hour that I don’t think of my husband.
He was 67 and died of a heart attack no warning.
I don’t think it will ever be the same, our lives are completely different.
Talking to friends who have lost their partners after several years say it will never be the same but somehow you get through each day. As many have said friends have been disappointing so so sad for us all. 
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Hi Wrens, sorry for your loss, i cant say it gets easier , maybe we learn to cope better, but there is always a trigger. I lost my soulmate 14 months ago, and i find i miss and love him more each day. i got otobate through last August, it felt like the end of part of him, this week i got receipt from solicitors fir trust eork and removing his name from the deeds, another bit gone, so all ive done since Monday is cry. i wish i could have left his name on the deeds , instead of removing another part of him.
We did everything together, but i made myself so out and join local knit and natter, go to coffee morning and start going to church, just to see people, not the old me, a different me, ive made new friends, all widows like me and we go to lunch monthly. ive started to smile, but then i come home to the empty home, and the noisy silence full of guilt because i went out when he should have been with me.
ive got very good at putting on the brave face , but im still broken and will be until im with him again.
The few hours with others does in its own way help me to cope, so give it a go if you can it may help, we have to find a way to live, its what they would want, each step brings us closer to being together again.
Take care xx
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Feeling just the same. Lost my darling hubby 2 1/2 years ago and miss him more than ever now as the first painful days and weeks. It’s as if half of me has gone and I struggle on every day with the missing part. The only way of coping is to find moments of peace and possibly joy each day, to bridge the gap between the moments of utter loneliness and desperation. Mine are found in my garden, watching the birds and now Spring blooms emerging, a delicious coffee sat in a quiet place and a chat with the rare friend who truly understands. Nothing replaces that loss though - it hurts so much. Live to all going through it. X
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@Johnr this is a lovely update and a lovely story about your wife. I do hope you visit him in Spain and play guitar. Sending you much love xxx
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Thanks @Story I certainly hope so. You take care:heart:
I understand exactly how you feel, Wrens. I lost my wife after 42 years of marriage — she meant everything to me, and now I feel completely lost. Life feels so empty, and at times it all seems pointless. I’ve spent countless hours asking myself why I’m still here, and I still don’t have an answer.
I long to love and be loved again, yet at the same time, the thought of meeting someone new feels like a betrayal to my wife. People often say that grief gets easier with time, but it’s been almost five months, and I still cry, I still feel lost, and I still wonder what the point of it all is.
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Yorkie you are still very early on in the grieving process. I am 7 months in and I feel the same as you. We were married 48 years and he was my life. I feel very lost and lonely. Its a struggle to get through the day. Hang in there. Wishing you peace.
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Thank you, DickensMom. It is hard, but I’m working on it
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I know how you feel. I lost my husband of 50 years back in September 2023. My first Xmas, his birthday, my birthday, our anniversary were all terrible but I got through them with the support of my children and grandchildren. I’m so lucky to have my daughter living close by. I still find myself talking to him around the house and often the tears well up for no real reason. I’ve not been able to part with his ashes yet, but we will go as a family in September and scatter him at sea, as he wished. Perhaps I need that final closure and release. I wear his wedding ring on my middle finger next to my wedding band, so I like to say I’m not a widow but married to an angel. I’ve learned how to run the house alone, get repairs done etc and I’m even trying my hand in his garden. Keep pushing through each day as it comes, some will be better than others, but be proud of the 100% success rate each day you do that, knowing that your husband will be proud of you for managing without him. I hope you have a support network around you, if so do use them, it really does help 
🪽
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My wife organised all the repairs in the house, by contacting her trusted tradesmen. Until she got ill, she even did some herself.
I have to now take over responsibility. I’ve managed to find contact details for the glazier who replaced a pane in one of our windows that had condensation a few years ago. A pane in the window next to it has had the same condensation for a while. Never got round to it because of the wife being ill.
The same glazier came this morning to replace it. The wife’s ashes were on the sideboard supervising us.
My wife was also an avid gardener and had numerous large pots filled with flowers in the front and back garden. This morning, I gave several of them to our lovely neighbours as I can’t really take them all with me when I move. My son is taking a load and I’ll take half a dozen or so of smaller ones that are empty. I am not a gardener, so they would be wasted on me.
I am not looking forward to viewing houses without her. She was always the forceful one and also made decisions on which house we should go for. Thankfully she was always right.
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Thank you for sharing.
My son lives just a short two-minute walk from me, and my stepson is only a five-minute drive away with our grandson, who I’m blessed to see every week.
I do everything I can to be there for them — I take my grandson to school two or three times a week.
Our younger grandson is still too little for school, and it aches knowing my wife never got the chance to watch him grow. She would have cherished every moment.
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I can’t imagine moving away at this point, my fear is what would happen if she came back she would not be able to find me. Does that sound stupid?
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Not stupid at all. My wife’s ashes are buried in the garden of remembrance of the church where we got married and also where she was brought up.
If we had been living in our homeland of 
then I would probably stay in the house, even though it’s too big for one.