I lost my husband in June after 38 years together. He was my rock.
It is getting worse not better because I think the shock has worn off. He is not here, even worse he is no where in the world. I could search high and low, go to every country, meet the billions of people on this planet, but I won’t find him because he has gone, he is no longer here. And I find that so hard to cope with.
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Hi @mary2 ,
Thank you so much for sharing this with the community 
I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.
Take good care,
Alex
Hi Mary, I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my husband suddenly in April after 36 years of marriage. I too have struggled more lately since the shock and numbness wore off. Reality is now hitting home that I’ll never see him again and I just can’t bear it. I also keep asking myself where has he gone? I’ve been hoping for some sign that he’s out there watching over me, but have felt nothing… I’m heartbroken 
my thoughts are with you.
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Hi Mary, I am so sorry. From reading posts, it is normal to hit reality and the finality of it all and the heart breaks some more. I am still numb at 6 weeks and can’t imagine feeling worse than this. It is just awful, the whole “widow” thing is just awful.
Much love.
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mary2
Oh how I relate to yourpost. It’s been 10 months for me and that’s exactly how I feel.
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I am 13 months since I lost my husband and feel exactly the same xx
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Nala
It’s a terrible feeling I know. I Just wish tbere was a cure.,but I don’t tbink there is one. We just have to strive for better times.
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Hi Mary
I share your feelings entirely
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